Gentlemen, Start Your Engines: Sofia Vergara Is Now Single


If you think the only thing holding you back from exploring a committed romantic relationship with Sofa Vergara is the fact she’s engaged to another dude, today is your lucky day. The Modern Family actress and fiance Nick Loeb have broken off their engagement because their jobs forced them to spend so much time apart.

Being a celebrity ain’t easy, people.

“He’s always trying to use her success to make himself successful,” a source says of Loeb, a failed politician who now owns fried-onion topping brand Onion Crunch. “I think she’s finally started to see him as the opportunist he really is.”

This is normally the part of the post where we’d try to disingenuously convince you that you have a chance with the newly-single babe. But this time is different because JESUS CHRIST she fell for an Onion Topping Dude.

Maybe you do have a shot.

[H/T: New York Daily News]