By now we all know about green beer and Shamrock shakes. But what else other festive items can you ingest in between binge drinking during St. Patrick's Day? Here are 9 bizarre green foods to try this St. Patrick's Day.
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Don't confuse this with green tea ice cream, which may shock you with its deliciousness, but green bean ice cream is also a sweet treat in the Japan and China. It’s known to come in both popsicle form and also in sundae form. Yeah, it’s like a sundae, except the chocolate sauce is replaced with pureed green beans. Sounds like something a frustrated parent concocted in an attempt to get their kids to eat their vegetables. I guess it could be the best of both worlds for ice cream and green bean enthusiasts, but for the first time in awhile, I think I’ll be skipping desert.
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For the people who like a little bit of pop to that morning piece of toast. Most 8 oz jars of this southwestern concoction can have up to a pound of jalapeno peppers in them. If that doesn’t open your eyes in the morning, I dunno what will. Although one should be careful eating jalapeno toast and drinking a cup of coffee. That may cause some intestinal issues that might, well, make you tear-up during your morning bathroom break. It’s also supposed to be very good with crackers and cream cheese. Sounds pretty good if you like a little bite with your breakfast bagel and can handle the heat.
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A few years back the folks at Heinz experimented with a few different colors of ketchup in order to try and capture the “kids with wild imaginations and no regard for taste buds demographic.” Heinz just added food coloring and kids went nuts for it. As cool as the idea sounded, actually seeing green or purple ketchup on your hamburger just kinda ended up making your food seem a little less appetizing. After six year on the shelves, Heinz discontinued the product in 2006.
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Yep, the stuff that they use to slime people on nickelodeon dating back to the days of You Can’t Do That On Television is completely edible. I know because I toured the Nickelodeon Studios when I was little and when the tour guide said you could eat the slime-- it literally blew little my mind. Of course there have been several variations over the years, but it’s basically made from either lime jello or vanilla pudding mixed with flour, green coloring and sometimes oatmeal. Not exactly world-class cuisine, but still very edible and always very entertaining when poured on people’s heads.
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Bacon is awesome. Legally, it should probably be put on everything. But alas, my letters to my congressman go unheeded. It never crossed my mind that someone would want to eat green bacon, but some folks are just way ahead of the curve when it comes to bacon innovation. Obviously, I’m not as much of a bacon lover as this person is; but I assume it’s part of a balanced Irish breakfast. That picture just drives home the point that you can do almost anything with bacon. Well, everything except prevent heart disease...but using bacon for medical purposes is still a very young science. Give it time.
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That’s right green wine. Nope, this isn’t wine that is good for the environment or made from shamrocks; just a glass of Chardonnay with a bit of green food coloring in it. And why not, we have green beer, why should wine drinkers be left out of the loop. Have some fun this St. Patrick’s Day by pouring a glass of green wine and hunting for some leprechauns. Look at you -- drinking your wine and looking like a high-class Ninja Turtle. You get your drink on, Donatello.
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This is a candy made from the Prickly Pear Cactus and oddly enough contains no artificial flavors or preservatives (although you can buy it in a few different flavors), so it's a fairly healthy treat. Cactus has been a part of the diets of Mexican and Central American cuisine for thousands of years. So when you bite into this candy, your probably chewing on cactus just like the Native Americans and cowboys of the old west did. It’ll make you feel like your in the film City Slickers. But not City Slickers 2: Curly’s Gold. Duke Washburn was about riding, not dilly dallying around, chewing on cactus and gabbing like school girls.
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OK, this isn’t so bizarre, but its cult-like following is. It’s just a vanilla milkshake with green food coloring and a hint of mint (sometimes not so much); but people lose their mind over this McDonald’s dessert. Greatest marketing ploy in the history of fast food! Milkshake sales at the restaurant spike during March.Throw a little food coloring in something white and people become intrigued. People that wouldn’t be seen dead in a McDonald's will sneak out and grab a Shamrock shake when St. Patrick’s Day nears on the calendar.
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For the adults in the crowd that live where it is legal, we have a drink hailing from northern India that may not be so green in color, but has a lot of green in it. Used in the annual Hindu Holi festival, this almond-flavored shake's main ingredient is pot. A few cups of water, a few cups of milk, some chopped almonds, a little sugar and an ounce of marijuana are the main ingredients in this cannabis cocktail. It may not be the way that the Irish intended St. Patrick's Day to be celebrated, but it's the way the Grateful Dead did. So if you've got the green to get the green, you can sip one of these and enjoy the holiday from a whole different perspective.
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(Previously published on March 17, 2010.)