I don’t even have a joke for how weird this is. We’re through the looking glass here, people. Listen, I grew up on Troma films. I stayed up all night and got high and watched USA Up All Night or rented them from the video store. I love ’em. I love how gleefully crappy they are. But the absolute last thing that this idiotic world needs is a big-budget Toxic Avenger remake.
Wait, let’s edit that a bit. Do you know what the world needs even less than a big-budget Toxic Avenger remake? A big-budget Toxic Avenger remake with John Travolta in the lead role. Filmdrunk has the news that the embattled Travolta has been attached to the project, which will be directed by Hot Tub Time Machine‘s Steve Pink. Nobody else has been cast.
The worst part about it is the studio logline for casting, which I’ll just reproduce in full.
Action-comedy remake in the vein of THE MASK… he’s an environmental superhero… doesn’t want it to be campy…
Doesn’t want it to be campy. A movie about a nerd who gets doused in toxic waste and becomes a slime-covered crusader for justice and they don’t want it to be campy? What the hell do these people think they’re doing? Weirdly enough, the studio behind the remake is… Troma. How did they get the money for this thing? Did they make 100 cheap movies just to make one really expensive one? I’m just so confused. I need to lay down.
Why don’t you watch the original Toxic Avenger for free on YouTube while we figure this out?