TheToiletPaper.com Gives the Low Down on Ozzy Osbourne

by 9 years ago

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Ye who have not defiled a national monument with your urine cast the first stone.

Twenty-eight years ago today, Ozzy Osbourne‘s dyslexia got the best of him when, instead of remembering the Alamo, he relieved his member on the Alamo. On the morning of February 19th, 1982, after slamming a bottle of Courvoisier, the self-proclaimed “Prince of Darkness” left his hotel room in search of more booze. Since his wife and manager Sharon locked up his clothes to keep him from leaving, the hammered head-banger put on one of her dresses and darted out the door. The rest, as they say, is piss-tory.

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NUMBER

900

Daily quota of car horns Ozzy was required to tune at a car plant, according to a 2002 Rolling Stone interview. It was Ozzy’s first musical job. Is your car horn in tune?

QUOTE

I can honestly say, all the bad things that ever happened to me were directly, directly attributed to drugs and alcohol. I mean, I would never urinate at the Alamo at nine o’clock in the morning dressed in a woman’s evening dress sober. –Ozzy Osbourne

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FACT

After being fired from Black Sabbath in 1979, a dejected and depressed Ozzy was found binging on coke and booze in an LA hotel room. Sharon Arden (Black Sabbath manager Don Arden‘s daughter) told Ozzy that, if he got it together, she would manage him. Three decades and 37 million records later, they have three kids.

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