Waffles Tackles Albinos, Golf, and Shooting Pool

by 10 years ago

[inline:santa]This is the latest installment of Ask A Bro with Waffles McButter. Got a question of your own for Waffles? Email wafflesmcbutter@brobible.com. You can also now follow Waffles on Twitter or be his friend on Facebook.

Dear Waffles,

First off, you are an inspiration. However, I will cut to the chase. I’m chilling with my bro and we are deciding whether f*cking an albino chick is +2 bro points or -2 bro points based on rarity alone. Second, which is more bro? Pool or golf?

Much brospect,


Yo Bro,

You pose a very interesting question. Well, the first one is interesting, the second one, however, is simple. Golf, to me, is more bro. Others out there in the BroBible universe feel free to weigh in but I cannot see how pool could ever come close to being as “Bro” as golf. Pool being more bro than golf is about as feasible as you sucking your dick — it’s never going to happen.

Now that we’ve crossed that hurdle, let’s talk about whether or not it awesome to f*ck a chick who is, for all intents and purposes, transparent. Notice how I said “f*ck,” because dating an albino is completely unacceptable. Is that mean? Fuck it, I don’t care.

In my professional opinion, bagging an albino is pretty impressive. Personally, I have not bedded an albino, but if one of my bros did, I’d throw him a party. Being able to f*ck an albino with a straight face or void of any vomit speaks volumes of a man’s bravery. So if you are asking this question because you saw your dick through some chick’s stomach recently and your boys are giving you shit about it, don’t fret. What you did makes for a great story and that is reason enough for doing it.

In general, Bros need to diversify when it comes to their sex portfolio. I’m not telling you to go out and f*ck the bearded lady when the circus comes to town, but go dabble in a race other your own. The perfect time to do this is while you’re in college or in your 20s. Get out there and mark up that belt of yours with all kinds of women from all walks of life. You’ll never know what you like unless you taste it. If you find yourself to be attracted to a farm animal, use some self restraint and seek professional help, but if you want to f*ck an Asian, a Guidette (they are a different race of people as far as I’m concerned), a black chick, or even a white chick, go do it. You might discover something worthwhile.

Egg noggin’ and raw doggin’,

Waffles “