How Do I Approach Girls Without It Being Creepy? And How Do I Land A ‘Fit Girl’ When I HATE Going To The Gym?

by 4 years ago
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Q: So I’ve been single for 2 and a half years now. I’m at the point in which I have to think whether what I say to a girl will be alright or not. However, with all the assholes catcalling, how do you approach women without seeming like these assholes? Right now a good ‘Hi, what’s your name?’ or ‘I think you’re cute I wanted to say hi’ approaches seem to go to the line of cat calling.

A: All of this catcalling bullshit is getting out of hand and it’s starting to piss me off, so let me set the record straight.

You walking up to some girl on campus, introducing yourself, chatting her up a little bit and asking for her number? Not catcalling.

You hollering “YER ASS IS NICE” at some girl from the opposite half of a sidewalk? That’s catcalling.

The first scenario doesn’t count as catcalling because you’re approaching the girl, introducing yourself so you’re not a random weirdo screaming about body parts from a distance and your intent is to get to know the her, not to be a fucking creep that comments on boobs and ass all day. Now granted, approaching girls like this on campus probably isn’t going to work. When I’m walking around campus my mind is on 3 things:

1. How fucking hungover I am
2. Did I do the homework for my 1:30? I didn’t. Well shit.
3. It’s only 9:59 in the morning, is it an acceptable time to eat lunch yet?

None of those thoughts include men, getting hit on or trying to get laid. It’s all about the setting, honestly. Approaching chicks on campus is far less likely to end in a phone number than approaching chicks at a bar, mostly because chicks at a bar are generally looking to meet new people and mingle, while girls on campus are walking around mentally rehearsing the oral presentation worth 25% of your grade that they have to give in 15 minutes.

It’s common sense, honestly. Always think to yourself “Wait, is this creepy?” If the answer is “Yes,” then don’t do it.

Q: Me and my girlfriend have been together for more than a year now and we generally had sex frequently but obviously not a whole lot. Now it’s gotten to the point where she doesn’t even want/like to have sex. I know it’s certainly not me, because she definitely digs it but it all just came out of no where and I go through a period of blue balls for almost two weeks at a time. I need more sex! What the hell is the deal?

A: Hate to break it to you (but not really), but it probably is you. It’s not necessarily something that you’re doing or saying, but there’s a chance that she’s just losing interest in your relationship and the idea of having sex with you fills her with “Meh” instead of “Oh baby let’s bang.” Has your relationship gotten stale and boring? Is she generally disinterested in the things you say more than usual? Tell-tale signs dude, y’all are probably gonna break up soon.

Now if that’s not the case, then there might be something going on in her personal life that’s bothering her that she hasn’t told you about. Just because you two lovebirds have been shaggin’ it out for a year doesn’t mean that she tells you everything, some things are better left as secrets. Maybe she has a sick grandma and it’s stressing her out, maybe she’s flunking a class or maybe it’s something so simple as “I have a really bad rash down there and it’s embarrassing and having sex makes me itchy.” Just ask her about it in the non-douchiest way possible and don’t mention anything along the lines of “Wah wah plz fuk mehhh mah balzz r blu.” Make it about her, not yourself.

Q: I’ve been friends with this girl for two years and I have feelings for her but I think I’m friend zoned. Should I stick around and see if something happens or just leave it alone?

A: Leave it alone. If you make a move and she doesn’t feel the same way your friendship will be hella awkward afterwards, and chances are that if you think you’re in the friendzone, you probably are. Don’t fuck with it.

Q: So the whole “fit chick” thing has gotten pretty big these past few weeks, and they’re definitely a new player the dating game. I was wondering how most girls feel about guys who aren’t really into that. I’m not saying I’m not at the gym and keeping care of myself, I just have different priorities and don’t feel like gymming 3 hours a day to look like The Rock. However I’d love to date a fit chick and wanna know what they’re looking for in a guy.

A: You can’t assume that all “fit chicks” are looking for the same things when it comes to guys. Every girl has different likes and dislikes, and while being “fit” is certainly a reflection of how they like to keep themselves, it’s not necessarily how they like their men. For example, I go to the gym for an hour after work every day and my boyfriend is a giant blob. I don’t care if he’s “ripped” or whatever, I just care that he makes me laugh and as long as my boobs are bigger than his it’s all gravy. The only thing I can tell you to do is to go find a “fit” chick, find out if she’s into guys like you (whatever you are) and if she is, hooray! If not, onto the next.

Tl;dr: Everyone has their own individual preferences.

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