A Bro Tortoise Had So Much Damn Sex On The Galapagos He’s Been Credited With Singlehandedly Saving His Species
Every dude dreams of the hypothetical where the entire world’s population is wiped out by disease, except for you and ten Victoria’s Secret supermodels, who all made it to your bunker before becoming infected, and now it’s up to you to have sex with all these women all the time over the next twenty years to repopulate the Earth.
A modern-day Noah, only with hotter babes (let’s be honest, Noah wasn’t travelling on his ark with top-of-the-line trim).
It’s never gonna happen to you, but a lucky tortoise in the Galapagos got to spent the past 40 years fucking his species back from the brink of extinction.
Diego came to the Galapagos Islands from the San Diego Zoo in 1976. In that time, there were only two males and 12 females on the island of Espanola, which is part of the Galapagos Archipelago.
Since then, Diego’s fucked into existence 800 tortoises.
He lives in a breeding center on another island, and his task is to sex up the six women tortoises in his enclosure all the time (except when they are giving birth, I’m guessing). From there, they are delivered to Espanola to live out their tortoise days.
The island now has 2,000 tortoises, and they are no longer considered endangered.
Here’s Diego after having some real good sex.Embed from Getty Images
What a Bro.