These Giant Black Bears VICIOUSLY Attacking Each Other In Someone’s Front Yard Must Have Been Over A Hunny

Good GOD. Can’t help but wonder what sparked this fight between two of nature’s most feared creatures. My guess is that one bear was getting turnt on some honey spitting some game to a hunny and then the second bear who hadn’t gotten laid in months got jealous and cockblocked the shit out of him. Probably told her that his friend had bear herpes. Herpes is a deal breaker even for the most vicious beasts in the wild. Regardless, I gotta side with the bear whose dick is riddled with sores on this one because under no circumstance should a friend stand between you and a chick. It’s your job to fuck it up. And you will, eventually. But at least you’ll crash and burn on your own terms. And there’s some honor in that.

P.S. Even if the herpe bear lost the physical battle, he won the war by giving his buddy herpes with this awkward mouth-to-mouth interaction.

bear fight


We’ll call it a draw.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.