This Guy Got Arrested For What Is, Quite Possibly, The Creepiest Reason Of All Time

by 4 years ago

Shelton Police Dept.

Looks like someone has been crying, and for very good reason. Because that someone in the photo above, who’s name is Michael Migani, was arrested for giving a child – THAT HE DID NOT KNOW — a wet willy.

Yes, this man stuck his finger in his mouth, moistened it to his liking, and then he dipped it into the ear of a random 4-year-old boy in the waiting room of a Connecticut business.

According to WFSB:

Shelton police have charged a man who they said stuck his finger in a 4-year-old boy’s ear.

Police said 34-year-old Michael Migani put his finger in his mouth and then stuck it in the ear of a 4-year-old, in the presence of the boy’s mother.

This act is also commonly known as a “wet willy.”

The incident happened in the waiting room of a business on Center Street, while the child was playing with his mother, police said.

The fuck, Bro? Couldn’t muster the strength to withstand that urge? Had no other way of making it through the rest of your day without finger fucking a child’s ear canal?

Sure, this is a minor offense — he’s charged with second-degree reckless endangerment and second-degree breach of peace — but I don’t even know how you recover from this. Especially when the Google Search results for your name all point to that time you made the decision to stick your slobbering wet finger in a young boy’s ear. Again, WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU DO THAT, MICHAEL?!?!

Anyway, maybe Migani can move to Florida and only be like the 134th biggest creep in the state. Silver lining?

TAGSStupid peopleWet willyWTF