High School Students Trick Teacher Into Eating Pastries Frosted With Semen

by 1 year ago
Van Wilder

Van Wilder

Get a load of this story from Omaha, Nebraska.

Three high school students have been charged after they allegedly tainted some baked goods with their own semen. The boys, all freshmen at Westside High School, went to the bathroom and masturbated into containers before they mixed the semen into frosting according to the Omaha Police Department. They then coated the mixture on some turnovers, which their female teacher ate.

You can’t get a more handmade frosting than that.

“Upon tasting it, the teacher felt something was off with the taste,” News 4 San Antonio reported.


Maybe these master bakers were just expressing their love for Pearl Jam?

Then this seminal event happened to blow the lid off the viscousy prank: another student told the teacher about the boys’ devious plot.

Semenbon? For a small royalty, I’ll allow the kids to use that name if they plan to go national with their cummy treats.

The three boys, ages 14 and 15, face a misdemeanor charge of disturbing the peace, and a suspension of a week and a half.

For the 59-year-old teacher, this is probably not enough comeuppance for the pastries made of baby batter, but there is no law against adding bodily fluids to food in Nebraska.

The president of the teachers’ union in Westside said the students should face serious consequences. “The Westside Education Association is deeply concerned with any violence perpetrated against teachers and other school employees,” Michael Fryda, a science teacher at the school wrote. “What happened at Westside High School was not a harmless prank and it should not be treated as such.”

These boys picked the wrong teacher. There are teachers all over the country going to jail because they covet the trouser gravy of high school students. Bad luck I guess.


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