Introducing Bull Market Fridays

by 9 years ago

Since the credit crisis reared its ugly head in 2007 bull market lovers across the globe have been forced to put away their Rolexs and Prada shoes in exchange for a more “appropriate lifestyle.” However, when I rolled over in bed this morning and saw two female Russian hookers in my bed I knew… the bull is back. I will be keeping track and observing the trends that scream bull market so that we can all be witness to the long overdue comeback.

It's a bull market if…

  • You have a business card with just your name and 40 time on it.
  • You have more than two types of product in your hair at one time.
  • You take off on a plane without deciding on your destination.
  • {C}You go out in a V-Neck and jeans without an undershirt, belt, or underwear (more bull market if you are exposing chest or ass hair).
  • You own button downs with tear-away sleeves.
  • You pretend to get excited to watch “Entourage” on Sunday evenings.
  • Your shoes sound like small percussion instruments from the Dave Matthews Band drummer when you walk through a somewhat quiet office.
  • You don't date girls on the premise that you're holding out for a pair of Bulgarian models to fall out of the green-card office and into your arms.
  • You wake up with shades on.
  • You're friends with your masseuse.