Forever ‘The Dude,’ Oscar Winner Jeff Bridges is Your Bro of the Week

by 9 years ago

Way out west there was this fella… fella I wanna tell ya about. Fella by the name of Jeff Bridges. At least that was the handle his loving parents gave him, but us bros have never had much use for it. Mr. Bridges, well, we just call him “The Dude.”

As obvious as this choice may be, it would sacrilegious if I dared give anyone other than El Duderino the Bro of the Week. Although I have yet to even see Bridges' performance in “Crazy Heart,” if it's anything like the pure gold he left us with in “Lebowski” then there is no question in my heart as to why it was he — and not the lady killer, Clooney — who walked on stage and accepted a tiny statuette this past Sunday. In fact, in the realm of all things bro, Bridges' win finally puts him on the same acting pedestal as a few other bro deities: Jack Nicholson, Sean Penn, and Dirty Hairy (who, by the way, has only won for his directing roles).

Many may forget, but Bridges had another very Dude-like role in 2009's “The Men Who Stare at Goats.” Although the movie blew that particular animal, Bridges, as always, put on a very enjoyable performance, especially when they were doing LSD at the end of the movie. I know that Bridges may be a known more for his pot smoking, but something about that last scene tells me that he and LSD are old friends.

Bridges is not the Hollywood playboy-type that we all admire, but that doesn't make him any less of a bro. Maybe his lack of philandering dilutes his bro status to some of you, but being married and having a family, especially as an actor, is as brave of an endeavor as there is.

I understand that at our age we think marriage is this cataclysmic event because we would gladly donate a testicle, kidney, and a few of our STDs to live like a famous man-hoe and f*ck b*tches effortlessly. But once you hit that age (40s) when your friends slowly start getting married, you might realize that having a family isn't so bad. And just think, if your father never gave up “the game” and courted your mother — smashing her cute little cervix to bits prior to unleashing his sauce in her newly dilapidated vag*na — your ass wouldn't be here today. Too graphic? I hope so.

The point is, Bridges is a true bro, who lives his life the way he sees fit and after four previous Oscar snubs, the Academy finally gave into the whole brevity thing and did him a solid. The Bible abides, and I don't know about you but I take comfort in that. It's good knowin' Bridges is out there. The Dude. Living the married life and takin' 'er easy for all us sinners…