Bro Loses His Sunglasses After Hooking Up With A Girl, So He Texts Her Non-Stop For Over A Year
Nothing sucks more than losing a treasured item. For example, I once lost a beloved Tabasco sauce shirt in the back of a friend’s car after drinking heavily at a Widespread Panic concert. He moved across the country shortly afterwards and I haven’t seen it since. Once, coming back from the bar in college, I left a pair of shoes in a cab. I also left my favorite pair socks at a friend’s apartment and didn’t even realize they were gone until she asked if they were mine six months later. My dignity? I lose that all the time. The key to being someone who is always losing things is to just not be attached to anything.
This texting saga is about a Bro who lost something very near and dear to him: A pair of sunglasses. He left them at her place after meeting her at a bar and hooking up with her. But then she moved away and he didn’t hear back from her for an entire year. It’s one the best texting sagas you’ll ever read — right up there on texting Mt. Rushmore with the Bro who swiped a hooker on Tinder and proceeded to troll the shit out of her.
Here’s the set-up, in his own words on Imgur:
Okay, so. Last summer, I met this girl at a bar. We hit it off, I end up going back to her place, whatever. She gives me her number before I leave and I hit her up to hang out again about a week later. I had gone to a football game earlier that day and then later met up with her at a friend’s house before walking to a bar to see a band play. It was a sunny Saturday day game and I was wearing sunglasses, but by the time I met up with her, it’s about 7pm and the sun was going down. So on the way to the bar, I asked her to hold my sunglasses in her purse for me. When we get to the bar, I see a few of my friends and I start introducing her while we order drinks. She turns to me and says she’s going to go outside real quick to make a phone call and she’ll be right back. She never comes back. Which is fine, I wasn’t that into her anyway. But what was not fine was that she left with my sunglasses. So over the past year, I’ve been desperately trying to get my sunglasses back from her with very little success. That was until last week when I finally made a breakthrough… Here it is from the beginning.
He proceeded to text his one night stand about his lost sunglasses for over a year. I admire his dedication and persistence — there’s almost no doubt I’d give up and move on after a month.
Hey Matt — while we’re on the topic — have you found the BroBible shirt you lost yet?
Here’s the saga in its entirety, via The Chive: