You’ll Never Guess Why This Naked Businessman Walked Into A Police Station With Only A Cardboard Box Over His Junk

by 5 years ago


We all have those nights where we wake up from a blacked out stupor with a birthday balloon tied to your left ankle, a fraternity composite randomly tossed aside and scribbled on in the corner of the room and a brand new inflatable pool in the front yard with several cartons of eggs inside. No? Maybe that’s just me then. For Ling Fu, however, he recently had one of those nights…except he woke up naked. In public. Via Mirror,

“What started out as a few drinks with friends gradually worsened when he fell into the arms of a young woman who promised him the time of his life for a little money.

Hours later the 51-year-old woke up in an alleyway with no phone, no wallet, no cash … and no clothes…

He delved into a nearby bin, pulled out a small cardboard box to cover his privates and then marched straight off to the local police station. And there he complained vociferously about the ladies of the night in Taiwan’s Taichung City who, he moaned, even had the cheek to steal his underpants.

He went into detail about how he met the woman outside the city’s Fengyuan railway station and how she offered him the chance to spend some time in her company in exchange for what he described as ‘a small fee.'”

Hey man, hookers gonna hook. Did you bother to ask what the “small fee” was? Because it might’ve been all of your clothes, your wallet, and your ID, in which case she was just collecting payment. Gotta be specific in these kinds of situations dude, the fine print isn’t there just to ignore y’know.

“Mr Ling admitted he had been drinking, which made the offer all the more attractive and he took her up on it, only to find himself hours later waking up in a nearby alleyway behind a rubbish bin completely naked.
Even his underwear, he complained, had been taken and he had grabbed a box out of the bin so that he could get to the police station to complain.”

Andy Samberg and Justin Timberlake would be proud.

[H/T & Images via Mirror]

TAGSdumb crimenaked people