Hey Dude, No One Cares How High You Can Box Jump, So Simmer Down And Quit Making Me Feel Inadequate

I can do a box jump if that’s exactly what I’m jumping on – a box. An average, run-of-the-mill box that everyone and their grandmothers are capable of jumping on.

But these boxes? Dude. Chill. It’s not a skill you can put on your resume and your dick size is not directly correlated to how tall these boxes are. Simmer the fuck down and do something else, like learn to knit or just quit making me feel bad in general. Jeez.

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