Bro Goes To Hook Up At Tinder Girl’s House, Turns Into A Deranged Threesome From Hell With A Naked Man Chasing Him
Not gonna lie to you guys, I feel like absolute shit right now. My throat is raw, my head is pounding and I hurled in the bathroom a few minutes ago despite having an empty stomach. In exactly 75 minutes I’m leaving to go to Five Guys because I NEED CHEESEBURGERS since I basically haven’t eaten anything in 2 days. I kind of want to die.
But this story about Redditor nomoretinderforme who got dragged into a deranged threesome from hell? Well it made me feel just a little better…or maybe it’s because I barfed. Either way I hope it brings a smile to your face and puts a pep in your step because the only thing in my step is sore knees and an overwhelming feeling of nausea. Ugh.
This literally just happened in the last half hour and I’m still kind of in shock/ confused. So I’ve been chatting with this girl on Tinder for the past couple days and things were going well. Tonight she suggests that I come over to watch a movie and cuddle. I accept the invitation since all I was doing was watching the finale of True Detective and this season has been confusing enough. I make it to her apartment complex when suddenly my phone dies, that should have been the sign right there. I run to the gas station to buy a charger since I already drove out there and I’m committed to this cuddle.
I get into her apartment and everything seems normal, we go strait to her room since her roommate (a dude) was in the shower right next to the living room. Not even a few minutes into the movie we start making out and it starts getting a little toasty. While were kissing she keeps getting texts and going out to talk to her roommate a couple times which I thought was odd. She comes back in and takes off my shirt and then says, “I want you to fuck me right now”. It catches me off guard since I didn’t take her for the type.
I knew something was up at this point so I tell her that she was going a little fast for me. I hear the shower stop in the other room and then she says, “do you mind if my roommate joins in?” That isn’t really what I had in mind and get up a little startled when suddenly roommate guy barges in balls naked and says, “I’m going to pound you into the ground, I’m going to pound you into the fucking ground.” As he gazed into my eyes my dong went limp and I proceed to sprint out of the apartment as fast as I could with my shoes and shirt in one hand.
As I’m running out he yells, “I’m going to track you down, you better run I’m coming after you.” I didn’t look back and ran as fast as I could to my car in shock and disbelief that something like that actually happened to me. Needless to say I’m going to take a break from Tinder for a little while.