People Shared Their Worst Experiences After A One-Night Stand And It’s A Scary World Out There

by 3 years ago
worst one-night stand experiences

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You think you had a problems when you woke up in a “coyote ugly” situation once or twice? That’s nothing compared to what these poor, poor Redditors had to endure when they woke up after a one-night stand.

As the person who posed the question in the first place said, “Some of y’all need to stop drinking alcohol or need better friends.”

Warning: this may make you never go home with someone you don’t know after a night on the town ever again.

Let’s start off with a semi-tame one just to get our feet wet, plus I like his attitude at the end…

I was studying abroad for a semester in Brazil and the university had one night a week where their students would take the exchange students out. Usually it would be a club or bar, and sometimes just drinking on the beach. This night we were at a club, and for some reason I indulged myself a lot more than usual. My first blackout. I woke up the next morning in a strange room, strange bed, with a cute Brazilian girl beside me. She wakes up and I quickly realize she didn’t speak any English (this was only a couple weeks in so my Portuguese was nil to none to be honest). My wallet was missing, my shirt was ripped, she wanted to go another round that morning (which I did so I could at least remember it this time), then I realized I was in an area of this city that isn’t exactly the safest. Had to break out her computer and use Google translate to tell her to call me a cab, and then have her loan me money to get back to my dorm. Oh, and replacing credit and debit cards overseas is a breeze, let me tell you.

Moral of the story – doesn’t matter, had sex. ~ Havins

Now let’s get a little weirder…

Woke up to her mom standing over the bed looking at us both. I’m hung over and can barely move so I tried to hide by covering my eyes with my arm but, in the nicest tone of voice, she says “Honey, could you go out to the couch on the living room for a minute for me?” I get up out of the bed and realize I have on a pair of girl’s cheerleader shorts, she just shakes her head at me. The chick I had just had crazy, drunk sex with is still passed out. I leave the room and her mom closes the door behind me and as soon as that door was shut.. she went off on her daughter, YOU FUCKING SLUT, GET THE FUCK UP, YOU WERE SUPPOSE TO BE AT WORK 3 HOURS AGO.. can’t remember everything she said but the yelling continued for 10-15 minutes then her mom storms out the door. I’m laying on the couch in nothing but the cheerleader shorts because my clothes are still in the bed room so I just pretend to be asleep, luckily for me she just walks right past me and leaves the apartment. ~ ShutUpAndGoFish

This next one, just wow…

She told me to get up because she had to babysit her granddaughter. First I thought she was joking. She was not. ~ rrollie

This one’s just not nice…

Was at a local spot a few years back, met this girl who was pretty hot (according to 10 of my closest cocktails). Anyways, chill for a bit, head to her house, smackadatazz and fall asleep. I woke up and noticed a book bag, etc, school books. Ask her what she’s studying and she tells me she goes to the local HS. I’m die a little inside and leave. I ran into her a few weeks later and it turns out she was fucking with me cause she needed me out of the house before her roommates got home. ~ axionj

Here’s a reminder that your hookup miiiight not be totally single…

She told me I could sleep in as she left for work early, just to lock the door on my way out. Her estranged husband decided to pop over, notices me in the bed, naked, gets pissed off, rants about how she’s a terrible person, and oh BTW did she mention she was married and has a kid. I start get dressed, as I’m putting my shoes on husband picks up TV/VCR combo and is about to leave. I say, “don’t steal her TV, she’s going to think I did it.” he did not seem to care. ~ klitchell

And yet another reminder… and a very creepy one at that…

I met a girl at a show that my band was playing at, went back to her place, had sex 3 or 4 times that night, then fell asleep at probably 7am. I wake up at about 9am, completely disoriented, and hear her boyfriend kissing her saying “Mmm, looked like you guys had fun last night!” He was apparently watching us the entire time. I didn’t even know she had a roommate. ~ NOISY_NOAH

And this one, well…

She peed my whole bed with me in it. ~ crowntheking7

Cougars can be fun!

Hooked up with a cougar from the bar at which I worked. Woke up the next morning to sounds coming from the kitchen. She says it’s her son. For some reason she also mentions he’s starting a new job that day. I say a brief hello to him as I leave the house. Guess who showed up at my work for training later that day.

EDIT: (since I keep getting asked). LOL. It was the son that showed up. I had to train him. ~ Varnigma

Here’s one with a unusual twist…

Her dad woke me up, told me his daughter had left the house and asked me to hurry up and leave. I wasn’t quite sure what was going on but I followed his requests and left. I sent the girl a text and told her that I found it strange and kind of rude that she had just left me sleeping in her bed while she went out and met some friends on a Saturday morning. Then I went on and met my friends and we went swimming as I told them about this strange situation. When I got out of the pool I had a missed call from her and a text where she told me that I had peed all over her room during the night, standing in the bed peeing on the walls and the floor and she couldn’t contact me at all. She told me she had tried to wake me up countless of times during the morning and eventually left because she was all done with me. She was really hot and I am in to much shame to speak to her again… ~ jvcnivico

And this one might be the worst one of all…

She woke up and said she wanted to marry me and have kids. ~ filthy-carrot

Check out the rest of the one-night stand horror stories over at Reddit, if you dare.

Of course if you have any you’d like to add, please feel free to do so in the comments. We’d LOVE to read them.

Man scared in bed image by Shutterstock


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