Beauty vs. The Beast: JoePA and Team BroBible Take on Playb*y Bunnys in Week 12 Fantasy Football
Pilar and Deanna,
Nine and two, huh? Impressive record, but look who you’ve been playing against: Guyism? Gunaxin? Sure, they’re good friends of the Bros, but playing them is kinda like playing a dodge ball team comprised entirely of kids who wear headgear braces: You know you’re going to win before a ball is even thrown. My covert Playboy insiders inform me you also gave your intern the greatest football ass-whooping he’s received since wearing a pink Power Rangers jersey to peewee training camp in the fourth grade. Congratulations on beating up on the free labor. Class move.
It’s time for a blogger to rise to the occasion and silence this lucky streak. BroBible is prepared to do just that. But, before we go any further, can we get a tally of how many times Playboy’s photo department has taken a red pen (link NSFW!) to your collective photo shoots? I’d love to get an over/under (purely for inter-office betting purposes). Those marked-up editorial composites will give me something else to chuckle about while boozing through the Thanksgiving holiday and whooping your asses between the hash marks.
I’ll start pumping the brakes there. I don’t want to get too mean because I’ve been stealing reading Playboy since I was old enough to reach the top rack at the corner gas station. Plus, I feel bad for you: It’s quite obvious your Lingerie Football League applications were lost in the mail. In the unlikely event you manage to win, I’m willing to pop a few tops from my private stock of Four Loko. But if you lose (and you will), I fully expect a complete turkey dinner with all the fixins, cooked nekked, of course. I’ll provide the whipped cream for the dessert.
There you go. Now you know my name. It's Brandon. Here's their response to my so-called “cocky audacity”:
Personally, I'm a fan of those strategically placed fantasy football magazines on the bookshelf in the background. Not that it increases their street cred or anything. Anyway, here are our picks:
Pilar and Deanna’s Week 12 lineup:
QB: Matt Schaub
RB: Mike Goodson
RB: Adrain Peterson
WR: Santonio Holmes
WR: Dwayne Bowe
TE: Joel Dreesen for now, but we’re waiting to see if Owen Daniels is healthy enough to start.
Kicker: Robbie Gould
JoePA’s Week 12 Lineup:
QB: Phillip Rivers
RB: Arian Foster
RB: Frank Gore
WR: Calvin Johnson
WR: Roddy White
TE: Jacob Tamme
K: David Akers
D: Philadelphia Eagles
Follow along at home and stay tuned for who wins this Thanksgiving-weekend fantasy football free-for-all.