PGA Tour Pro Kevin Na Told A Story About Caddie Steve Williams Being A Dick And It’s 1000% Believable
Kevin Na is the slowest player in the world. You put Na, Ben Crane, Bernhard Langer and me in a foursome and although I am a pretty decent golfer, on that day I’m shooting…one of them in the fucking head. I wouldn’t even make it past the 9th hole. These guys are so slow that it’s even painful to watch them play on TV. I can’t imagine being on a course with them. I’d snap…all of their necks. And I am a nice, reasonable person.
So that is why the story Kevin Na told about Tiger Woods’ ex-caddie Steve Williams is so believable. At the time the two were paired together in a group, Williams was caddying for Adam Scott and, in classic Steve Williams fashion, he found it impossible (as he usually does) to keep his mouth shut about Na’s dreadfully slow play. In his defense, he did it in the most hilarious, prick-ish way possible. For that I love him.
According to Alan Shipnuck‘s profile on Na:
Na could sense that Steve Williams was stewing. The following day, as Na labored to a 74, he believed Williams was giving him the stink eye and says that at round’s end, the caddie avoided shaking his hand.
“In the scoring tent,” Na says, “as I was about to leave, Stevie looks at me and goes, ‘Do you ever watch a bad movie again and again?’ I didn’t really know what he was talking about, so I just said, ‘Uh, no.’ He goes, ‘That’s what you are, Kevin, a bad movie. I never want to see you play again.’ And I looked at him, and I said, ‘Stevie, you’re out of line. If Adam has a problem with my play, he has every right to say whatever he wants. You’re in no position to tell me what you just said to me.’ He got real close to me and was saying basically that he could say whatever he wanted. It was getting pretty heated, but one of the Tour officials stepped in and said, ‘Guys, not in here.’ And that ended it.” (Williams declined to comment.)
Fucking tremendous. I’m genuinely looking forward to insulting someone, someday, by asking them if they’ve ever watched a bad movie again and again. Crazy that Na — who everyone, including him, knows is the slowest player on the planet — didn’t realize where that was going.
In Shipnuck’s piece, Na also told a rather tremendous story about Tiger Woods. It’s top-shelf Tiger.
At last year’s PGA Championship, Na approached Tiger Woods on the practice putting green and asked him to autograph a hat for Nam. Tiger knows Nam from junior golf and is well aware that he is a fixture in Korean tabloids for having romanced a well-known actress and a former Miss Korea, among others.
“Is Nam still getting a lot of ass?” Na recalls Woods asking.
Na replied that the hat was for Nam’s latest girlfriend.
That was an acceptable answer for Woods: “If it will help him get laid, I’ll do it.” The two cracked up, leaving the hundreds of fans surrounding the green to wonder what was so funny.
“If it will help him get laid, I’ll do it.” Eldrick, you dog. I just wish the public was able to know this version of you from the beginning.