ESPN is reporting that Miami defensive end Kendall Langford lost one of his diamond earrings during team drills today. The diamond is said to be worth up to $50,000, making this the second biggest tragedy in Dolphins history right behind the kidnapping of Snowflake by Ray Finkle and Dan Marino's entire Super Bowl-less career. Luckily for Langford, the team isn't filled with a**holes like me and at least nine members of the squad scoured the practice field for almost an hour trying to find the lost jewel. Unluckily for Langford, after that hour of searching, no earring was found and he and his teammates had to attend a mandatory meeting, while the field crew fired up the lawn mowers. When asked why he even bothered to help this irresponsible fool find his earring, defensive end Ryan Baker offered this up, “He's a teammate. That's what you do. It's a fat diamond. It's a shame.” It is a shame, Ryan, that this even made the news.