Picking The Winners For The 9 Stupidest Prop Bets Of Super Bowl 51

by 2 years ago
ATLANTA, GA - JANUARY 22: Atlanta Falcons owner Arthur Blank holds the George Halas trophy after defeating the Green Bay Packers in the NFC Championship Game at the Georgia Dome on January 22, 2017 in Atlanta, Georgia. The Falcons defeated the Packers 44-21. (Photo by Streeter Lecka/Getty Images)

Getty Image / Streeter Lecka

Save for the one year of my life that I actually won $1,000 on Super Bowl boxes, the prop bets might be my favorite bets during the BIG GAME. Why? Because one-sided Super Bowl games can be boring and the bets keep my interest. Also, they are largely idiotic and only a world-class boner would ever bet $100 on the color of Gatorade without some kind of inside information. That boner is almost always me!

So without further ado… here are the 10 stupidest prop bests of Super Bowl 51 and the winning bet for each.

What will Luke Bryan be wearing when he starts singing the U.S. national anthem? (Bovada)

Blue Jeans 1/2
Any other pants or shorts 3/2

Winning Bet: Blue Jeans

Here’s what I know, the man will be wearing denim. Whether that denim will be BLUE, I don’t know. But if you Google image search “Luke Bryan Concert” you will not find him performing in anything other than jeans. I know the Super Bowl is a big stage, but it isn’t formal. It’s a pizza and chicken wings kind of affair and that’s blue jeans territory. Or, if you’re me, it’s sweatpants territory.

How Long Will It Take Luke Bryan to Sing the U.S. National Anthem?

Over 2:15: -120
Under 2:15: -120

Winning Bet: Under 2:15

I just sang the National Anthem, start-to-finish, and timed myself. I embellished all the parts one would, and should, embellish and I didn’t even come close to going over two minutes. Luke Bryan’s last three anthems were used to get to the 2:15 mark, but if you ask me, it would take a real self-indulgent rendition to go over 2 minutes and 15 seconds.

Odds the opening coin toss comes up …

Heads: 1/1
Tails: 1/1

Winning Bet: Tails

This wasn’t the best season for the NFL. From a decline in ratings to on-going Deflate Gate bullshit, you might say they have been taking it in the ass all year. With that in mind, the toss has to come up as tails.

Odds the team that wins the coin toss …

Defers: 1/2
Receives: 2/1

Winning Bet: Defer

Clearly whoever wins will defer. We know Belichick likes getting the ball after halftime. Everyone knows that. So why would the Falcons take the ball and give him what he wants if they win the toss?

Odds on what color Gatorade will be poured on the winning coach:

Orange: 7/2
Blue: 15/4
Clear/Water: 4/1
Purple: 6/1
Yellow: 13/2
None: 10/1

Winning Bet: Yellow

For one, the Falcons recently covered Dan Quinn in yellow gatorade. Secondly, athletes are superstitious so I have to believe they will keep the winning color for the Super Bowl. Third, yes, I am going out on a limb here and saying not only will they win, but they will dose Quinn in yellow fucking Gatorade when they so.

Odds on which company will air the first commercial (after the coin toss):

Bud Light: 25/1
Lexus: 30/1
Intel: 30/1
Skittles: 30/1

Wix: 30/1
TurboTax: 33/1
Avocados from Mexico: 35/1
Mr. Clean: 35/1
Hyundai: 500/1

Winning Bet: Bud Light

You’re getting decent odds on all of these so you might as well bet on the company that has deep ties to the NFL and the BIG GAME.

Odds on which brand will win best commercial (per USA Today’s ad meter):

Budweiser: 5/2
Hyundai: 4/1
Wix: 5/1
FIELD: 13/7

Winning Bet: The Field

I have no reasoning for this, but based on recent history, I don’t expect a lot from the three companies listed over the field.

What color will Lady Gaga’s hair be when she comes on stage for the halftime show? (Bovada)

Blonde 1/4
Any other Color 5/2

Winning Bet: Blonde

Gaga has entered a more “let’s look normal” phase in her career and I think she sticks with what she’s known for.

Halftime Show: Which Song Will Lady Gaga Sing First?

“Born This Way”: +225
“Bad Romance”: +250
“Edge of Glory”: +600
“Poker Face”: +1000
“Just Dance”: +1000
“Any Other Song”: +110

Winning Bet: Any Other Song

I’m as cocksure as cocksure can be, but the songs of Lady Gaga are outside my wheelhouse. Although if one was so lucky to procure a setlist prior to the big game, they could making a fucking killing if she were to kick things off with “Just Dance” or “Poker Face”

TAGSFootballNFLprop betssuper bowl 51super bowl prop bets