Out of all the hangovers I had in college, the worst one was when I had blacked out off of cranberry vodka’s on a Tuesday night, then had to take a Plan Sciences midterm the next morning. It was a gen ed class, okay? I spent the entire 50 minute exam holding down the puke that kept trying to erupt out of my stomach and onto the poor unknowing girl sitting in front of me, and immediately after finishing the exam I sprinted to the bathroom and hurled everywhere. Then, since I’m a classy lady, I skipped my next class just to sit hunched over on the toilet and reflect on all the poor life decisions I made the night before.
Do I regret this at all? Hell no, I pulled a 96% on that exam sooo what-the-fuck-ever, I’m pretty sure after another night of drinking a few months later I was actually still drunk from the night before for the final. I can handle my shit in public, which is a trait that not everyone can boast…the prime example being this poor freshman at Oxford University who barfed during his English Language lecture.
During the final minutes of the 2pm lecture on etymology and word meaning, lecturer Dr Charlotte Brewer turned the discussion into colloquialisms like ‘lord of lash’, ‘prince of pulls’, ‘banter’ and ‘Jagermeister’ – which led to one poor student vomiting on the floor…
One English undergraduate, speaking to student newspaper The Tab, said: ‘It was hilarious because the whole room one-by-one became aware of it like a domino effect.
‘She looked horrified and was frantically asking for tissues. I’m not sure if she was hungover or not, but she certainly looked green around the gills.’
— igloo47 (@igloooo37) October 23, 2014
Don’t worry girlie, everyone will forget about it by December if you’re lucky, graduation if you aren’t. Either way congrats on showing everyone that even hungover as balls, you still managed to drag your ass to class. Most, and when I say “most” I mean “give or take 90%,” of students do NOT give enough shits about English Literature to pull that feat, so kudos to showing your commitment.
…but let’s be real, you probably should’ve just stayed home.