Some people are shy. Others, often to the dismay of everyone around them, are paranoid possessive. And nothing illustrates this phenomenon more than an insecure couple out for a meal.
Unfortunately for bartender Taylar (@Taylar), she got a firsthand experience with that kind of couple. But it wasn’t about shyness.
The Problem Is Theirs
She does not mince words: “Here’s your reminder,” she starts, “if you’re the type of b—- that needs it, your bartender does not want your man.”
OK, then. Understood.
But what happened to set her off?
As Taylar explains it, the couple came in, sat down right in front of her, despite available seats elsewhere. From the get-go, she says the vibe was off.
But she got them set up with menus and offered to get them some drinks started. And that’s when things got uncomfortable.
Taylar mimics the response she got from the woman: all frowns, huffs, and eye rolls. And the man just stares straight ahead, saying nothing.
What Meat Do You Want On Your Fajitas?
The couple ordered two shots of Don Julio tequila. So she ran through about five varieties before she says she gestured to a shelf full of tequila options.
His response? Intense eye contact and a hyper-articulated reiteration: “The. Don. Julio.”
“Awesome, say less. Blanco it is,” she says.
“It’s the least expensive” is her (internal) reply.
Then, the man ordered meals for both of them. His date wanted fajitas, so Taylar looks at the woman (as it is her order) and asks the pertinent question: “Chicken, steak, or shrimp?”
Instead of speaking directly to her server, the man repeated the question to his date. She then answered him, and he replied to the bartender. “She’ll have steak,” Taylar recalls him saying.
It happens once more when Taylar asked the woman if she wanted flour or corn tortillas. “Do you want flour or corn,” he repeated to the woman as if she hadn’t just heard Taylar.
“I want flour,” she responded.
“She’ll have flour,” the man told Taylar.
OK, weird. But the rest of the meal was pretty unremarkable. The couple didn’t complain, and finally, Taylar got to drop the check.
‘Nobody’s Looking’
After they settled up, Taylar picked up the checkbook and took a peek at the bill. It’s not good news.
There’s a message: “Stop looking” is printed in all caps where the tip should be.
“At what?” is Taylar’s immediate question.
“Your cul-de-sac-having toad of a man?” she asks before correcting herself.
“I’m sorry, that’s disrespectful to toads,” she says. “Stop looking at you not looking at me and your dumba– because you can’t speak to me as an adult to order your food?”
Then she makes her position unequivocally clear: “Stop looking at what? I’m not looking at you. I’m trying to serve you.”
Stay Mad, Says The Internet
Considering the TikTok got over 162,000 views, everyone’s got a theory about what’s really happening with that couple.
“She’s just mad cuz you’re gorgeous & existing,” says a user.
YourMom (@wanderfree07) has another hypothesis: “They were fighting before they came in.”
Others have got Taylar’s back. “Stop looking? What? She wouldn’t speak to you. Are you supposed to look at the floor while you speak to him?” writes Cornaynay (@cornaynay92).
But The Post Man (@sc13760) gets existential with it, saying, “I don’t know how anyone works with the public. I’d be arrested every single shift.”
Where Exactly Should I Put My Eyes?
The real question is: What the heck do you do when someone is incredibly rude to you at work? According to a June 2025 article in Food & Wine, the customer is no longer always right. Sometimes restaurants have to draw a line. This doesn’t always need to mean kicking guests out. Though sometimes it can.
Really, it shifts the focus onto communicating with an unhappy guest. The most important part? Stay calm and polite. But don’t grovel. Don’t let the guest “conflate service with servitude.”
The article also emphasizes preserving the atmosphere of a restaurant because truly disruptive guests impact everyone. “Cutting off the wrong customer should not be seen as turning away business. Rather, it is a strategic decision to solidify company values, increase staff morale, and maintain product-market fit,” it says.
And if the guest thinks the server or bartender is flirting with your date, the Facebook group “Female Problems” offers this reminder: “They aren’t.”
Expanding on this, there’s the notion that if the bartender is really flirting with you, it will be obvious. After all, bartenders flirt for tips, but they probably aren’t going to put their job on the line for the dude drinking the cheap Don Julio.
Real flirting looks like revealing personal information, a request to connect on social media, or drinks never appearing on your tab. Otherwise your bartender isn’t flirting; they’re working for a bigger tip.
@taylar.ar tonight at work … your bartender doesn’t want your man…I’m literally trying to do my job