‘Cocaine Shark’ Trends After Authorities Find $316 Million Worth Of The Drug In The Ocean

cocaine shark found ocean new zealand

istockphoto / brobible illustration


Move over Cocaine Bear. The internet has imagined a whole new creature thanks to a massive drug discovery in New Zealand this week.

New Zealand law enforcement authorities reported they had found over 3.5 tons, or more than 7,000 pounds, of cocaine floating in the Pacific Ocean.

That’s around $500 million New Zealand dollars worth of the drug, or $316 million in American currency.

Under Operation Hydros, New Zealand Police, working in partnership with New Zealand Customs Service and the New Zealand Defence Force, were able to recover the illicit drug in the Pacific Ocean.

Eighty-one bales of the product have since made the six-day journey back to New Zealand aboard the Royal New Zealand Navy vessel HMNZS Manawanui, where they will now be destroyed.

Police Commissioner Andrew Coster says given the large size of the shipment it will have likely been destined for the Australian market.

“There is no doubt this discovery lands a major financial blow right from the South American producers through to the distributors of this product,” said Coster.

“This is one of the single biggest seizures of illegal drugs by authorities in this country. While this disrupts the syndicate’s operations, we remain vigilant given the lengths we know these groups will go to circumvent coming to law enforcement’s attention.”

Coster added, “We believe there was enough cocaine to service the Australian market for about one year, and this would be more than New Zealand would use in 30 years.”

Naturally, because it’s what the internet does, this report elicited numerous jokes and memes making reference to there now being a “Cocaine Shark” on the loose.

“Oh boy @ElizabethBanks, if they find cocaine in the clouds you can have a full trilogy: Cocaine Bear, Cocaine Shark, Cocaine Eagle,” someone else tweeted.

“If we don’t get a COCAINE BEAR VS COCAINE SHARK movie what are we even doing here?” another person asked.

What’s next? Cocaine Sharknado?

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Before settling down at BroBible, Douglas Charles, a graduate of the University of Iowa (Go Hawks), owned and operated a wide assortment of websites. He is also one of the few White Sox fans out there and thinks Michael Jordan is, hands down, the GOAT.