A No-Nonsense Ranking Of The 10 Best Thanksgiving Foods

Did I say no-nonsense? Sorry about that, I meant totally nonsensical. Because as we gather here to today to rank the best Thanksgiving foods of all time I’ve come to realize that many people across our great nation have absolutely outrageous opinions.

The best Thanksgiving foods are the staples. This is a fact. But our country is made up 50 distinct states, each with its own preferences and history of sides and traditions. So while Thanksgiving might look eerily similar from town to town in the Northeast, Thanksgiving dinner might be unrecognizable between a families living in Connecticut and Hawaii, or Florida and Arizona.

Definitive Ranking Of The 10 Best Thanksgiving Foods

First up we have the honorable mentions. I’ll explain below why these Thanksgiving staples are fantastic but why they simply do not make the cut in these definitive rankings of the best Thanksgiving Foods of all time.

Honorable Mentions

• Green Bean Casserole
• Cranberry Anything
• Apple Pie
• Brussels Sprouts
• Candied Yams

Green bean casserole is great! It’ll have some crunch and be decadent. But it is demonstrably inferior to a top-tier sweet potato casserole which borders on dessert when topped with brown sugar and pecans. For that reason it is an honorable mention.

Cranberry sauce is amazing though I’d rather eat it solo than smother it on turkey or anything else. It is a must-have dish at Thanksgiving, truly. Turkey Day is not complete without cranberries. But is it an S-Tier Thanksgiving food? No. I’ll save stomach space for other times.

Apple Pie is as American as it gets. But by the time we get to Thanksgiving we are deep into Autumn and everyone is apple’d out. Orchards are picked dry in early Fall. The apples going into Apple Pie on Thanksgiving are of lesser quality than we were eating a month ago. And that’s not to mention how we’ve been inundated with apple-flavored everything for months.

Brussels Sprouts are one of my all-time favorite side dishes… year round. While they might make an appearance at Thanksgiving there is nothing uniquely Thanksgiving about them. They’re just a solid side dish. And while candied yams are phenomenal they can easily be replaced by sweet potato casserole. There’s no need for such similar flavor profiles on the table. Now let’s get to the greats!

10. Bread (Rolls + Cornbread)

I’m of two schools of thought when it comes to bread… On the one hand, eating too much bread will fill you up in a hurry and you won’t have enough stomach space for the other Thanksgiving dishes you have been dreaming of for months. On the other hand, it’s bread we’re talking about here.

Homemade bread cannot be topped. I say this as someone who avoided bread for most of the last year only take down two baskets of bread at Fleming’s Steakhouse recently because my primal instincts took over.

Skillet cornbread. Rolls. Homemade bread loafs. It doesn’t matter. You actually NEED bread in the mix as a vessel for the butter, to help sop up the mashed potatoes, and the next day when it is time to start making turkey sandwiches. Bread is a must-have on Thanksgiving.

9. Mac And Cheese

Mac and Cheese can be eaten year round, sure. But Thanksgiving is the Super Bowl for Mac and Cheese. We are not pulling out the little Annie’s shells from the box on this special day.

Instead, we are breaking out the food processor the night before to shred 6 different types of cheeses and chill them overnight in their shredded state to get the consistency perfect before making the world’s greatest Mac and Cheese.

People who say that Mac and Cheese isn’t one of the best Thanksgiving foods can be classified into two camps: (1) they have never had truly great Mac and Cheese because they’re lazy or whoever cooks is lazy and (2) the lactose intolerant folks who avoid it at all costs and tell the world they wouldn’t want it anyway.

8. Pecan Pie

Pecan Pie, pronounced ‘puh-kaan’ and not ‘pea-can,’ is an elite dessert. Unfortunately, at some point society decided that Pecan Pie should only be served on or around Thanksgiving. It is an utter rarity to find it in a restaurant these days unless it’s an establishment that prides itself on an array of desserts.

There are many recipes out there for Pecan Pie that will have you seeing the light. My grandma’s was the best and that’s not up for debate. But this one from Food that has been dubbed the ‘Utterly Deadly Southern Pecan Pie‘ is an ideal place to start for anyone looking to make their own this year.

7. Mashed Potatoes and Gravy

Firstly, they have to be homemade. I feel silly even having to say that but it must be said. Mashed potatoes out of the box are fine and dandy for the other 364 days a year but not on Thanksgiving.

The gravy must also be whipped together from the turkey trimmings. Everyone knows this is the only way. In fact, I’m not even sure there is another way to get gravy on Thanksgiving. Is that even something that can be purchased in a store? Anyway… Mashed Potatoes and Gravy with the turkey, with the stuffing, with the bread… It pairs with every single item on the plate. It is the ultimate ‘locker room guy’ dish that brings everything together.

6. Turkey

It feels like every year there are more and more turkey haters in this country and I simply will not stand for the turkey slander. I’m a dark meat guy but a moist slice of white meat is top tier.

Smoked, broiled, fried… As long as the turkey is moist and properly cooked and there is enough food to go around for everyone then Thanksgiving is complete. It’s the bird that brings everyone together, not the giving of thanks. We all know this.

5. Potatoes Au Gratin

Now we are getting to the good stuff, the top 5 items on the Best Thanksgiving Foods of All Time list. Coming in at #5 is potatoes au gratin. Make them as rich as possible with the heavy cream.

Do NOT try and cut calories on this dish or you will find yourself with a seat at the kid’s table next year. Real pros know that you can infuse the heavy cream with Thanksgiving aromatics like rosemary or thyme to really elevate the dish.

4. Glazed Ham

Years back after I got my first smoker I decided to smoke the turkey that year and it dawned on me that I could pick up a spiralized ham and toss it on the smoker, infuse some smokey flavor, and bring it up to temperature without doing much. Since then, I’ve incorporated a nice glaze mostly consisting of brown sugar and maple syrup. I’ll dump a few ounces of top shelf bourbon in there for it to simmer in while it smokes in an aluminum pan.

From the very first year I started bringing smoked ham to family Thanksgiving I was screwed. It was such a hit that it’s now more requested than the turkey. I’ve become a one-hit wonder and everyone only remembers me for the ham. It’s that good. Don’t sleep on the ham.

3. Sweet Potato Casserole

When prepared correctly, Sweet Potato Casserole will change people’s lives. For a large portion of my life I was noncommittal on Sweet Potato Casserole but the curtains were pulled back and the truth was revealed to me at Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse. They make a god-tier Sweet Potato Casserole that is on the Mt. Rushmore of the Best Thanksgiving Foods.

What makes theirs so special? I’m glad you asked. Brown sugar and lots of it. Ruth’s Chris posts the recipe on their website for those who are curious. But be forewarned, if you bring this side dish to Thanksgiving this year you will be committing to making it every year for the rest of your life because it’s truly that delicious.

2. Stuffing

Did my family already order Thanksgiving themed t-shirts to wear this year? Perhaps. Did I select ‘Stuffing’ as the word emblazoned across my t-shirt because I believe in my heart of heart that it the best Thanksgiving side and a god tier Thanksgiving food? Maybe.

I’m more of a traditionalist when it comes to Stuffing. Give me the aromatic herbs. I’ll mess with an oyster/mushroom stuffing if someone brings it but only if there’s traditional stuffing on the table as well. Do not call it dressing. Just get out of here with that nonsense. The name is ‘Stuffing’ and it deserves all the respect in the world.

1. Pumpkin Pie

Last but not least is Pumpkin Pie as the headliner on this list of the best Thanksgiving foods of all time. Was there ever any doubt? Pumpkin Pie is the G.O.A.T. and it’s undeniable.

You can zhuzh it up as a Pumpkin Cream Pie and I won’t judge you. In fact, the Mennonite bakery down the street from me makes the world’s best Pumpkin Cream Pie and it is a staple at Thanksgiving in recent years.

Warm or cold, it doesn’t matter. A week later? Still phenomenal. It is somehow the best use of pumpkin and it’s not even close. All hail Pumpkin Pie.