Woman’s Subway Sandwich Order Is So Weird, She Has To Warn The Workers: ‘I Looked Up Subway Eggs And That Made This 1000x Worse’

Chances are, everyone’s got that one thing they eat when no one is looking. Perhaps it’s something like pickled onions on pizza. It’s probably the kind of comforting treat you can enjoy in the privacy of your home.

But sometimes, you’re forced to involve others. Because you can’t make a Subway sandwich in your kitchen. For one content creator, Schmizzles (@schmizzles), who has the occasional very specific craving, she’s got to visit her local Subway. Each time she does, she feels compelled to give the sandwich artists there a disclaimer.

Schmizzles took to TikTok to share exactly how absurd her order is. And over 11 million people learned the unsettling truth.

Whisper Your Secrets To The Internet

In a voice barely above a whisper, and without making eye contact with the audience, Schmizzles murmurs her order for the world to hear.

“My Subway order is genuinely so atrocious. If a worker spit in my sandwich, I’d actually understand,” she starts by saying.

Just walking in to get her order makes her palms sweat and heart race. “I go up to these employees, and I go, ‘My order’s gonna be a little weird,'” she says. She feels like she’s got to prep them.

Then she gets to it: “OK, can I have some of the white bread?” she asks.

She continues, “OK, on it. I want you to put lettuce.”

“Now,” she says, “I want some of the egg.”

Then comes the horror. “I don’t want it toasted. Not the sandwich, not the egg. I eat it cold,” she admits.

The Worst Sandwich In The World?

Schmizzles says that, inevitably, the Subway employees try to make her meal more palatable. They double-check that she doesn’t want it heated, asking, “Are you sure?” Yes. Yes, she is sure.

Then they offer a sauce, typically mayo. That’s a hard “no,” too.

“What else do you want?” she says they ask.

“I want my sandwich in my mouth,” she responds to herself. As she’s checking out, she alleges she can feel the judgement.

But in her defense, she explains that she first came up with this treat in 2021 when she was a vegetarian. She was on her period and had a “really bad craving” (her words). Now she just craves it.

Subway Serves Their Eggs

Viewers were pretty much stuck on the fact that Subway eggs exist.

“Looked up subway eggs and that made this 1000x worse,” one viewer shared. 

Research reveals that Subway’s eggs arrive as pre-cooked, frozen egg patties. In photos, they’ve got a yolk in the middle and are surrounded by the white. So they evoke eggs. But that same article is not complimentary about the flavor. Calling them some of the “worst breakfast sandwiches” in fast food.

Aonther user, DevLauvick (@devlaurvick), notes, “As a ex subway worker…girl you def got a nickname.”

Others jumped straight to the financials. “$12 for a cursed egg salad is diabolical,” Felix C. (@felixsings) said.

When Did Egg Sandwiches Get So Popular?

Here’s how we got here: Egg sandwiches trace their popularity back to the bustling days of the 19th century. In the morning, factory workers needed a quick “cuppa” and a meal on the go. So ever-enterprising street vendors dreamed up a breakfast bun with a fried egg, meat, and cheese on it. Called a “bap,” it made the leap to America, where it became the “Denver Sandwich”—an omelette of diced ham, onion, and green pepper folded between two slices of white bread.

Like its British cousin, the Denver Sandwich was a hit with working folks because it fit into the industrialized day. Since those days of the Industrial Revolution, breakfast sammies have become a staple in the lives of workers across the world. But we’re betting that not many people prefer them cold.

BroBible reached out to Schmizzles via TikTok direct message and to Subway via the press email. We will update this if either responds.