Every week celebrities go on Twitter and speak their minds. Sometimes they’re funny, sometimes they’re thought-provoking, and sometimes we don’t know what they’re talking about. This list is all of that and more.
Strap in. It could get bumpy. These are the most entertaining celebrity tweets this week.
I put the “erectile fun” in “erectile dysfunction.”
— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) February 16, 2015
Thanks for the mental image, Conan.
I'm watching the "Fridays" reunion special.
— Andy Kindler (@AndyKindler) February 16, 2015
Did that air on Saturday?
Bradley Cooper kissing Betty White is the best thing ever. #SNL40
— Alyssa Milano (@Alyssa_Milano) February 16, 2015
Alyssa’s definition of “best thing ever” needs work.
I don't mean to brag but I have personally suffered through every Microsoft Surface commercial that has aired on television.
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) February 16, 2015
You aren’t the only one, Jim.
Why was #SNL40 on a Sunday?
— J.A. Adande (@jadande) February 16, 2015
See my earlier comment.
https://twitter.com/JamesDeen/status/567330914829873153
Nor should they.
https://twitter.com/chrissyteigen/status/567366507647074306
Yes.
Just what our founding fathers would have wanted – to be remembered & honored by 'sales'. #PresidentsDay
— RainnWilson (@rainnwilson) February 16, 2015
I believe that it says that in the Constitution.
https://twitter.com/ArianaGrande/status/567394567012757504
You heard the woman.
https://twitter.com/TheOrlandoJones/status/567562996939907072
They can’t hear you. A commercial is on.
Too tired to shit.
— Jeff Ross (@realjeffreyross) February 17, 2015
Now that’s fucking tired.
I wonder if Accountants feel the urge to represent negative Temperatures in parenthesis.
— Neil deGrasse Tyson (@neiltyson) February 17, 2015
Smart people humor.
https://twitter.com/michaelianblack/status/567719159107452928
Oh the disgrace.
get it on
— Adam Carolla (@adamcarolla) February 17, 2015
Bang a gong?
"Knock, Knock."
"Who's there?"
"It's me, Derek."
"No, I know it's you Alex Rodriguez."— Richard Deitsch (@richarddeitsch) February 17, 2015
True story.
I remember when my mom made me apologize to my 1st grade class after I was caught stealing dimes out of crayon boxes. I TOTALLY meant it.
— Michelle Beadle (@MichelleDBeadle) February 17, 2015
As did we all, Michelle.
@mcuban how about a follow to DM you an idea.
— Jose Canseco (@JoseCanseco) February 17, 2015
Guessing Cuban raced to hit the follow button here.
It's cute how I used to think this "barely-holding-it-together" feeling was temporary.
— Anna Kendrick (@AnnaKendrick47) February 17, 2015
Welcome to reality, Anna.
Better Call Saul is really filling the void the Breaking Bad left when it ended.
— Kayden Kross (@Kayden_Kross) February 18, 2015
Amen.
should I be offended when my wife asks me a question and, JUST as I begin to answer it, I realize she was asking Siri?
— Jimmy Kimmel (@jimmykimmel) February 18, 2015
Women almost don’t need men anymore, Jimmy.
My wife bought two pairs of Frye boots & now the closet smells like a divorced dad's sofa
— Andy Richter (@AndyRichter) February 18, 2015
Now that is a great reference.
Every time I see A-Rod try to recover from his missteps, I think I shld leave the broadcast biz & start a crisis management firm. #Smh
— Bonnie Bernstein (@BonnieBernstein) February 18, 2015
He really doesn’t get it, does he?
It's Ash Wednesday. Shit – where did I put my cigarettes?
— Denis Leary (@denisleary) February 18, 2015
Wrong ashes, Denis.
All this snow in Boston causing cabin fever symptoms like stripping & jumping from windows. Jumping into bed w/partner seems better
— Dr. Ruth Westheimer (@AskDrRuth) February 18, 2015
Dr. Ruth, always dropping knowledge.
Went to the beach wearing my Bikini Inspector shirt, and then seven bikinis got murdered and now I'm in WAY OVER MY HEAD.
— Nate Fernald (@natefernald) February 18, 2015
Don’t look at me, I love bikinis.
https://twitter.com/DennisDMZ/status/568282750425235456
Wait, the baddest ass?
If your day consists of repeated harassment and profanities aimed at people you don't know, how great can life really be? Waste of a ride.
— Michelle Beadle (@MichelleDBeadle) February 19, 2015
Welcome to the Internet.
https://twitter.com/jaymohr37/status/568424680454897665
Square pupils? WTH?
My wife was upset I fucked her cousin until I told her Kanye West is designing sweatpants now.
— rob delaney (@robdelaney) February 19, 2015
Smooth.
ISIS = RAISIN BALLS
— The Iron Sheik (@the_ironsheik) February 18, 2015
Have a great weekend, everybody.