If I’ve learned anything from Orange is the New Black it’s that there is apparently a lot of lesbian sex in jail by females who are homosexuals, bisexuals and heterosexuals who will switch teams due to their circumstances and viable options. From what I’ve seen in documentaries and TV shows chronicling real female prison life and in my discerning opinion, the inmates generally aren’t competing for Miss America any time soon. So I imagine that when a gorgeous Playboy Playmate struts her sexy self into a jail the gen pop must lose their goddamn minds.
Angie Vu is gorgeous Instagram model, former Playboy Playmate and “Asia’s Sexiest DJ.” But she is currently serving hard time in a Brooklyn jail after she was arrested for attempting to abduct her daughter.
On November 9, she was arrested in for not returning her 9-year-old daughter to the biological father who has custody of the child. Vu was busted by U.S. marshals at JFK Airport when she attempted to board a flight to China. France wants the United States to extradite Vu in the abduction case.
She was in so much trouble that not even Slick Willy could help her out.
Now she spends her days at the Metropolitan Detention Center listening to music, reading the Bible and trying not to let those pesky lesbians in prison get their hands, fingers, or tongues on her.
“A lot of lesbians around here and a few blondies are hitting on me,” Vu exclusively told the Daily News. “But I prefer to read my Bible for now.”
Angie, who lives in an open dormitory with 100 female inmates, should be more open-minded. Like I’ve never seen an actual female prison sex romp, but I’ve watched my fair share of lesbian prison porn and I gotta say, it’s really the cat’s pajamas.
“I tried my best not to get in any fight,” Angie said. “I thought prison could be much worse, though. Only saw prison on TV, I was ready for gang rape, getting beaten up and vowed to protect my face at all cost. So my social skill became handy.”
Prison doesn’t sound too bad, especially when you’re gawking at the alluring Angie all day.