National buzzkill: American reactions to Portgual’s World Cup dagger caught on video

Cristiano Ronaldo is a terrorist. A Goddamn terrorist. With less than 30 seconds remaining in stoppage time, he sent a cross that pierced the heart of every American. It shrunk our freedom boners, made it go immediately flaccid. Here’s a supercut of Americans reacting to Portugal’s World Cup dagger.

Videos (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)