First shots of Megan Fox in ‘Ninja Turtles’

Here’s what the new April O’Neil looks like. On a trampoline. Michael Bay won a few points of goodwill from me for Pain & Gain, but his Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reboot (which is just called Ninja Turtles because teenagers and mutants aren’t cool anymore) still looks like a dog’s ass. Even casting Megan Fox as reporter friend April O’Neil can’t save this mess, but this first set photographs from the Daily Mail that have her bouncing on a trampoline are sure fun to look at. Ninja Turtles is set to open on June 6, 2014.