Who got stuffed fuller: Lindsay Lohan’s box in 2013 or the White Sox’ nappy dugout?

It’s 37 degrees in downtown Chicago this morning. Fahrenheit I might add. So yes, it’s pretty cold. So damn cold that nobody showed up to the White Sox game today. And I mean nobody.


What’s your estimate? I’m going ~700 people. Now, let’s think about that for a moment.

How many people did Lindsay Lohan have sex with in 2013? If she averaged two dudes a day (and frankly, why wouldn’t she—-she’s the Wilt Chamberlain of our generation) that’s 730 people.

So in conclusion, Lindsay Lohan had more people in her luxury box than the Chicago White Sox. Thank you and have a nice day.