What were you doing when you were 17? I was waiting tables at a country club for like $2.83 an hour, plus tips. It sucked! But I got to work with my friends, so I guess I didn’t totally hate it. Jacob Wohl, however, is a dude with a freaking plan. The 17-years-old in Riverside County, California is literally running his own hedge fund. He claims to have $200,000 in assets (…I’m not sure what that means because the business-speak in the KTLA report are vague) and manages a few finances from his teachers. He’s earned the nickname “The Wohl of Wall Street” amongst his friends.
I can’t decide if this one of the biggest Bro stories I’ve ever heard OR complete bullshit. He’s 17 and staring into a Bloomberg terminal. Does he know how soul-sucking that it going to be by the time he’s 30? Dude… You’re a kid. And as hungry as you are for success in finance, remember it’s an industry where many, many people hate their lives on a daily basis. The part where he says “Yes, Bank of America is looking good!” while on a cell phone walking through his high school seems so… cartoonish. It’s like he’s trying to be a caricature of a Wall Street guy without the cocaine habit.
But hey, more power to him. He’s doing more than I ever was at 17. This kid has two options: Either be the next Gordon Gekko or the next Warren Buffett, except get so bored with the markets that you literally morph into Tony Stark and design an Iron Man suit IRL. Or just go full-on Bilzerian.
Who’s the bigger Bro? Mr. Hedge Fund manager below or the kid from New Jersey who made $300,000 picking penny stocks?
Here’s the KTLA report: