Bro Playing Pokemon Go At A Park Is Searching For Grimer, Finds Monstrous Double Sided Dildo Instead

Pokemon Go has taken people places they’ve never even dreamed of visiting, i.e. their local park, some random dude’s back yard who called the cops when he saw you lurking around his garden, and even that underpass where the heroin addicts (who turned out to be very nice heroin addicts, by the way) hang out from 4:00 p.m. onwards.

So when Lewix Oxley wound up trying to catch a Grimer in a nearby park, you can imagine his surprise when he found a giant double sided girthtastic dildo underneath a bush instead:

Speaking to Mirror (because this is a news story worth reporting outside of blogs that employ potty humor as their main audience draw, obviously), Lewis said that he “couldn’t believe it” and that he was in a “bit of shock” after he found the dildo. “I didn’t know what it could have been really, I had to double take – it must have been at least 18 inches.”

“It was weird because it’s a popular area and people use the park all the time.”

YEAH they do!

People were quick to point out that the dildo resembled an Onix (no it doesn’t) or that Lewis had stumbled upon “one hell of a Weedle” (eh, a little better), though if you asked Lewis, he’d tell you that he thought “It could have been anything, a snake – or a big stick. It was just funny and I started chuckling to myself after.”

[H/T Mirror]