Research Shows These Ten Cities Finish The Fastest In The Sack

According to new research from Promescent — a spray treatment for bros quick on the trigger in the shootout inside the vagina saloon — the city with the most men suffering from premature ejaculation is ironically nicknamed “The Big D.”

The company is basing this all assumption and product sales — Dallas buys the drug like its Binaca — as sales of the product are the highest in the country per capita.

Here are the nine other cities that finish way before their partner.

1) Dallas, TX
2) Washington D.C
3) Seattle, WA
4) Baton Rouge, LA
5) Memphis, TN
6) Raleigh, NC
7) New York, NY
8) Bridgeport, CT
9) Tampa, FL
10) St. Louis, MO

“While our research concludes PE transcends socio-economic status, age, race, and sexual orientation,” company CEO  Jeff Abraham explained, “geography, not so much.”

Dallas — home of the Big D…for about thirty seconds.

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Chris Illuminati is a 5-time published author and recovering a**hole who writes about running, parenting, and professional wrestling.