The Four Most WTF Politicians of All Time (Aside from Rob Ford)

However, there are those acts of gross misconduct that are simply inseparable from a politician’s ability to govern effectively. This list is by no means exhaustive. I know Maria Antoinette made orphans fight to the death in her living room and there are African warlords who wear suits made out of rebel skin. It is simply a list of my favorite WTF politicians of all time.

4. Boss Tweed

BAWSE.  Sounds like a comic book villain, right? Anytime you meet a guy who goes by “Boss”, it’s a pretty good indicator that he can have you murdered with relative ease. Tweed was the Nucky Thompson of 1860s New York, pilfering nearly 1 billion from the city’s treasury.  He built the New York County Courthouse for 178 million dollars, telling the Mayor that he needed 2.5 for the chairs alone. The chairs, bitches! Dude was scandalous before sex was even invented.

3. James Traficant

Most of you have never heard of this Ohio congressman, but let me bring you up to speed.

He would show up to Congress in a denim suit.
He made his congressional aides do chores on his farm.
His website features a picture of him holding a 2×4, inscribed with the phrase “Bangin’ Away in D.C.”

Oh, and he spent 7 years in jail for corruption and tried to run for re-election while incarcerated.  Basically, he was George W. Bush if he was allowed to act like George W. Bush. Government should be diverse. Crazy people included.

2. Marion Barry

Rob Ford pay homage. In the late 80s, DC was one the most crime-and-poverty stricken cities in the US. Marion Barry responded by smoking crack in a hotel room and claiming, “the bitch set him up”. He wasn’t a character on Chappelle’s Show; he was very much the mayor. But like I said, it’s not just drugs. It’s the judgment.  In 1987, a blizzard hit DC and was horribly mishandled by city crews. At the time, Mayor Barry was freebasing and watching the Super Bowl in Pasadena. Bitch set me up doe!!!

1.Silvio Berlusconi.

From the former Italian PM’s Wikipedia page:

“In November 2010, teenage Moroccan belly dancer and alleged prostitute Ruby Rubacuori claimed to have been given $10,000 by Berlusconi at parties at his private villas. The girl told prosecutors in Milan that these events were like orgies where Berlusconi and 20 young women performed an African-style ritual known as the “bunga bunga” in the nude.”

My life’s goal is to have a party where me and 20 chicks do the bunga bunga, whatever that may be. I see flame pits and a guy with a giant masks and spears chanting. The bunga bunga, bro? Fucking amazing.

Also, Berlusconi is straight up Italian Kenny Powers-Borat. Here are some of his finest quotes:

What's his name? Some tanned guy. Ah, Barack Obama! You won't believe it, but the two of them sunbathe together because the wife is also tanned.”

2.”Of course, their current lodgings are a bit temporary. But they should see it like a weekend of camping.” (After hearing about 17,000 homeless Italians after an Earthquake)

“Last night I had a queue outside the door of the bedroom … There were 11 … I only did eight because I could not do it anymore.” (talking about his sexual exploits)

He’s the man. He’s the hero we need. Everyone is so apathetic about politics, but who can’t love a guy that has bunga bunga parties and basically called Obama a “chocolate face”. In this time of political correctness, it’s refreshing to see someone who simply doesn’t give a fuck. He doesn’t have to. He has billions of dollars and “very little hair because my brain is so big it pushes the hair out”. Quote of the century.

Bravo, Berlusconi.

That wraps it up for me.  Do you have any other favorite WTF politicians? Leave ‘em in the comments section!

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