A How-To Guide In Impressing Your Girlfriend’s Dad, According To A Girl

I’m not going to sit here and say that it’s not important for you to impress every member of your girlfriend’s family, because it is, but there’s just a certain level of difficulty associated with impressing her pops.

There are a few reasons for this:

  1. The concept of “Daddy’s Little Girl” is very real. Most Dads will bite your fucking head off if you hurt their princess and thus they’re always on the defense.
  2. Men know how other men think, so even if you’re in a committed, fully-monogamous relationship a father will still have doubts that you’re a cheating loser.
  3. To the point above, a father will also have suspicion that you’re just using his daughter for sex with little intention of making an ‘honest woman’ out of her.
  4. As with most men, dads have strong egos that create exceedingly high expectations of who their offspring should be involved with.

I hope that didn’t scare you too much. Although, to be fair, it sort of should…nothing wrong with being a little bit nervous when it comes to interacting with the man who raised your girlfriend. It’s a big fucking deal. Don’t walk in around like a cocky-uber-douche who thinks he’s totally got Daddy in the bag. That will get you nowhere, but here’s what will:

P.S. this advice can very easily be applied to women meeting their boyfriend’s mothers.

Be Polite:

Some of you are definitely sitting there reading this thinking, “Yeah, no shit! All men are polite.” I say fuck all to that, that’s not true, and you know it. There are plenty of guys who don’t understand the concept that please and thank you will go a long way. Hold doors open for his daughter, pull out chairs for his daughter, and put that napkin on your damn lap.

Ask Questions:

In stressful or unnerving situations it can be really easy to get flustered when talking about yourself. All of a sudden he’ll ask you what you do for a living and you black out trying to figure out what you do for 8 hours a day during the week. He will most likely interpret that as you’re unemployed which is a huge red-flag. Instead of waiting for him to get to the hard-hitting questions, go ahead and ask them first. Take interest in his life. Getting to know a girl’s father is never a bad thing. Side note: try your best to look genuinely interested, no matter how boring it may turn out to be, or how shitty his jokes are.

Speaking of ‘Dad Jokes’…. 

Laugh at Them:

Hopefully your girlfriend’s dad is actually funny, which will make this checkmark an absolute breeze. However, in the event he isn’t and his jokes are really fucking awful…like textbook dad joke corny AF, laugh anyway. Remember, boosting his ego = brownie points.

The Story of How You Met:

If it’s cute/romantic/respectable, by all means…tell it like it is. If it was Tinder, a drunken encounter, drug-oriented, or the result of engaging in a threesome gone wrong…maybe make something up.

Speak Highly of His Daughter:

You should do this across the board. No matter how mad you are at her you should never say anything less than flattering about your girlfriend (venting to your bros at times excluded). But when it comes to speaking to her father, don’t feel lame for mentioning how great she is, how smart she is—you know, all that good stuff.

 

That’s really it gentleman: 5 simple, effective steps. I never claimed it was going to be rocket science. Again, a lot of you may be thinking this was obvious, but in a world where a lot of men act like boys sometimes you gotta get down with the get down and take some notes. However, if you know your girlfriend’s dad already hates you, there’s no going back. These won’t save you for shit.