IKEA Has A New Hot Dog For Sale And It Looks Like A Fat Black Turd That’s Been Sitting In A Pool Filter For Days

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IKEA is the only store where you can buy a bed frame with six consonants in a row for a name along with a bag of Swedish meatballs, but did you know that they’ve added another item to their infamous food court? Indeed, IKEA in Japan is now selling an all-black hot dog, something that no one asked for and yet here we are anyway. The advertisement above doesn’t make it look too bad, as in “I guess I would eat that if I were dying,” but the photos taken by your average consumer? Yeah…looks like I’m dying after all:

According to Rocket News 24, the “ninja dog” (supposedly named because it resembles a ninja’s scroll rather than the “fat black turd” anyone not working in IKEA’s advertisement department would call it) was launched to celebrate the store’s 10th anniversary in Japan. In other words, IKEA is real shitty at giving gifts and is likely to hand you a plate of garbage, stick a bow on it and call it “edible.”

Then again, the dark color is created through incorporating edible bamboo charcoal into the dish, which is supposed to help kill toxins in your body. And no, the irony of a hot dog killing toxins in my body rather than the other way around is not lost on me. Considering the bun is 20 centimeters and the hot dog itself is 30, it looks like IKEA tried to straddle two markets at once – fatasses who are sad they have to eat two small hot dogs instead of one big one, and people looking to be “healthy” and “detox.”

Either way, would you eat this? I don’t think so:

[H/T Rocket News 24]