Kindergartener Packs Own Lunch, Brings A Beer To School

This youngster knew that he was in for a rough day at kindergarten. There was to be an intense finger-painting session, somebody lost the Minion stuffed animal on Wednesday and he has been trying hard to fight off his glue-eating addiction. The only way the lad could deal with this stressful day was to bring a beer to school.

We take you to Murrieta, California where a student packed his own lunch and brought a beer to school. On Wednesday, a can fell out of the student’s bag as they were lining up for the early session at the Lisa J. Mails Elementary School. The can of Coors Light rolled onto the floor in front of everyone.

“It was a kindergartner making their own lunch, (who) thought they were getting a Coke and got the beer instead,” said Murrieta Valley Unified School District Spokeswoman Karen Parris.

“The parents had no idea,” said Parris. “They were shocked to learn it had happened.”

The can of beer was confiscated, and no word on if a teacher shotgunned it.

This kid says it was an “accident,” but c’mon I’m not buying this malarkey. He said he thought it was a can of Coke, but grabbed a can of Coors Light. Fucking such weak bullshit kid, Coke is in a red can and Coors Light is in a silver can. At least come up with a logical lie and say you thought it was a can of Diet Coke, which is also silver. Hey little dude you’ve got to be smarter, you’re only like 6-years-old, and you have hopefully 80+ more years of lying about your drinking habit.