A Lotta Weird-Ass Millennials Are Fine With Wearing Google Glass While Having Sex

People are more than welcome to have whatever sexual preferences they like. Some like to fuck with the lights on. Some like to fuck with the lights off. Some like to fuck by candlelight. I’m sure more than a fair share of people who have taken a good deal of MDMA have set their phones to strobe, put on some White Panda and fucked to the flashing lights.

So, ya know, to each their own. But one thing I think we can all agree on is that the bedroom should be an internet-free zone. Not the actual bedroom. Lord knows I’ve watched a ton of Netflix under my covers. What I’m saying is sex doesn’t need a WiFi connection.

Yet some millennials are so plugged in, the thought of fucking with their wearables on (short for wearable technology) doesn’t even faze them.

How many? Twenty-five percent. Which is a quarter of all people in that group, which is a larger number of the population than I feel should be allowed to think that way. Are you serious? There are 25% of millennials who are like, so what if I want to tweet while my dick is inside someone or someone’s dick is inside me?

From the New York Daily News:

Newly released survey results say U.S. Millennials are open to incorporating wearable technology in their lives, with one in four even showing willingness to wear such devices during sex.

Hey! Fuck that.

When it comes to dating and mating, 12 percent of men and nine percent of women said they would use wearable technology if it made them look more attractive to the opposite sex.

If using wearables could make them appear smarter, 12 percent of men and eight percent of women said they would do so.

Thankfully, those numbers are moot, because shit like Google Glass makes you neither more attractive nor smarter. Who the shit needs Google Glass in bed? Yes, it might make a fun POV sex tape and I guess you could pull up positions to try with audible direction and–

No. NO. This is a terrible idea. We are not humanoids. We are humans. There need be no robotics in fucking. Keep robots off my dick. That’s my motto and I’m sticking to it.

[H/T Daily Dot]