After we get to this chick (above) on the subway trying to sell LIVE crickets and worms who got bumped, spilled her bugs everywhere, and proceeded to have a meltdown with the D-Train all while stuck the tracks (and later attempting to puke on everyone) I just want to tell bros a quick something about my life, the story is below.
Now for the incident, via NYPost:
A crazed woman trying to sell crickets and worms on a D train suddenly threw them all over the crowded car, sending it into chaos during the evening commute.
A group of teenagers pushed her, prompting her to freak out and toss the box of pests into the air, said witnesses. Straphangers then started screaming and crying, and all ran down to one end of the car.
Someone then pulled the emergency brake and the train skidded to a stop on the Manhattan Bridge.
The air conditioning shut off and the screaming passengers were all stuck inside the sweltering car with the woman, who then treated them to antics for half an hour as the crickets jumped on passengers. The worms just wriggled on the floor.
“She was banging on the doors and trying to climb out the windows. Everyone had crickets on their arms. My girlfriend was crying,” said Calabrese. “Then some men were trying to hold her down and she started trying to throw up on them.”
The crickets and worms were easily the most normal thing to happen during this incident. Amidst this woman’s meltdown she pissed all over the subway floor, which gathered crickets in her pool of piss, and then spent some time attempting to puke everywhere.
I lived in Manhattan for the last decade, give or take a few months, and my time there ended last December when I moved back to my native Florida. Since I’ve moved back anytime I run into someone I haven’t seen in a while or catch up with friends when I’m visiting in NYC the first questions are ‘do you regret moving?’, ‘are you bored?’, ‘what do you miss the most about the city?’. Well, I can easily tell you what I miss the most about the city: the restaurants. And I can tell you with 100% confidence that I don’t regret my decision to leave NYC at all because HOLY FUCKING SHIT you’d never see anything like this incident happen in suburbia. Henceforth, when my friends ask me about my decision to leave NYC I’m just going to send them that clip above.