9 Reasons You Should Definitely Quit Your Job
Quitting your job isn’t an easy decision. In fact, it can be downright terrifying, especially when you realize the only thing standing between you and total personal failure is the $12 in your checking account, that $20 gift card to Olive Garden and your Xanax prescription with three pills left in the bottle.
But sometimes a bro’s gotta do what a bro’s gotta do, no matter how terrifying. These are the times when quitting your job isn’t so much a “life decision” as it as a “saving your life decision.” No one wants to fail, but sometimes the greatest failure is to do nothing at all while your life slowly drifts into oblivion. Remember, the goal isn’t just to survive, it’s to thrive, it’s to enjoy life, and in order to get there sometimes you have to have the guts to take a stand for yourself, to take a step back and choose a different, better path. In short, sometimes, dear friends, you need to quit your piece of shit job, especially if any of the following are true.
You See No Future for Yourself
Look, if you see yourself in the exact same place twenty, thirty years from now, then what’s the point? Unless you’ve already achieved all your goals (doubtful) if there’s no room for advancement, for taking the next step, either personally or professionally, then get out now, while you still can. Every year you wait will make it that much harder to get your shit together. A 25-year-old who decides to do something new is going to have a much smoother ride than even a 35-year-old who makes the same decision. The older you get, the more sheer momentum makes it harder for you to stop. Don’t rely on the fantasy that one day you will be able to send a Terminator back in time to scare the shit out of current you. Have the balls to do it yourself, today.
Your Boss Sees No Future for You
As bad as it is to not have any hope for yourself, it can be even worse to have some old asshole telling you there’s no hope. If you have a boss who doesn’t think you’ll ever amount to anything more than you already are, then you need to get out now, for all the same reasons described above. Sure, this is infinitely more frustrating because it’s just one dude or lady dude standing in your way, but an obstacle is an obstacle, and the only way to healthily remove it without getting on the 6 o’clock news for attempted murder is to remove yourself from the situation.
You Never Get Any Credit
No one likes the needy asshole who constantly needs an “atta boy,” but at the same time, if you never get any credit at all, then you’re in a bad situation. Of course, it’s even worse if someone else is stealing that credit. One thing you never, ever want to be is the office whipping boy, the one who does all the work, never gets any credit for it, and gets shit on by an asshole boss. If this sounds even remotely like your current situation, maybe it’s time to get into a better line of work, like prostitution or selling meth on the dark web.
You Can’t Get Up in the Morning
I’m not talking about the “fuck you, alarm” kind of not being able to get up. Everyone has to deal with that. I’m talking about the “oh god, my existence is hell, and I am going to vomit and then gently weep for an hour before I can get out of bed” kind of not being able to get up. If the thought of going to your job fills you with the sort of existential dread normally only seen in obscure black and white silent Scandinavian art films, then it might be time to reevaluate some things. That’s all I’m saying.
‘Office Space’ is Like Porn to You
If you find yourself watching Office Space every day and getting sprung every time the office building burns down at the end of the movie (spoilers for a twenty year old movie!) then you might need to take a moment to reevaluate some things. The same thing goes if you watch Horrible Bosses and think it’s an autobiographical documentary. If you willingly watch Horrible Bosses 2, you have much bigger problems and deeper issues that I can’t help you with.