Science Says A Little Bit Of Whiskey Can Help With A Cold, I’m Here To Tell You A Lot Will Work Better

by 5 years ago

We all know science is full of pussies. Yea, they do cool shit, like save the world, but whenever they do, they preach restraint and crap like that.

So, of course when they find out that whiskey helps with the common cold, they give you some super lame advice. Like only have a little. Drink it in moderation. Don’t get drunk. Don’t have half the bottle. That’s not gonna cure your cold.

Before you go ordering a half-dozen Manhattans from the local pub, know that too much alcohol will do anything but make you feel better

Fuck that. Drink it all. Because here’s what science had to say about the magic booze and its ability to make you whole after you get sick.

Drinks like hot toddies, which traditionally contain whiskey, lemon and honey, can actually give cold and flu patients relief from their symptoms, said Dr. William Schaffner, chair of preventive medicine at Vanderbilt University Medical Center in Nashville, Tenn.

It just can’t prevent or cure a cold or flu virus.

“It would not have an effect on the virus itself, but its effect on the body can possibly give you some modest symptom relief,” Schaffner said. “The alcohol dilates blood vessels a little bit, and that makes it easier for your mucus membranes to deal with the infection.”

Sick. A hot toddy is good, but I recommend it straight. Quicker. Faster. And really, the more you drink, the more your cold symptoms go away. That’s a proven fact. Ever had a cold and gotten drunk? You forget all about it.

You may feel like shit in the morning, but you were gonna feel like shit either from your cold or your hangover, so why spend the previous evening miserable, when you could be drunk?

Nope, drunk is the way to go.

Meanwhile, in Japan, drinking 30 beers a night has been found to prevent the flu!

A Japanese study this week found that an ingredient in beer can curb the respiratory syncytial virus, which causes cold- and flu-like symptoms, according to The Associated Press. The study, funded by Sapporo Breweries, found that humulone, a chemical in hops,  can fight viruses. However, someone would have to drink 30 12-ounce cans of beer for it to work.

So, drink the fuck up.

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