According To A Survey Of 1000 Bosses, These Are The Best Illnesses To Fake When You’re ‘Calling In Sick’

We’ve all been there, either hungover or tired or just don’t feel like working. So we decide we’re going to make the dreaded phone call to the boss to tell him just how “sick” we are so we can spend the day on the couch playing video games and binge-watching Netflix.

The only real question we have before making that call is, “What illness shall I fake today?”

Well, thanks to a survey by AXA PPP Healthcare of 1,000 business leaders, aka bosses, we now have a better idea of which fake illness your boss is most likely to believe when you call in sick.

Surprisingly, raging hemorrhoids is not on the list, though I think it might work too.

Here they are in descending order of success rate…

9. Migraine

8. Common cold

7. Anxiety

6. Depression

5. Elective surgery

4. Stress

3. Injury by accident

2. Back pain

1. Flu

According to their survey 1 in 4 will believe you if you say have the flu. Not bad. However, somewhere around numbers 7, 8 and 9 it drops to 1 in 5.

I still say raging hemorrhoids is the way to go. Is your boss really going to want proof of something like that? No chance.

H/T Esquire UK; Man on phone image by Shutterstock

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Before settling down at BroBible, Douglas Charles, a graduate of the University of Iowa (Go Hawks), owned and operated a wide assortment of websites. He is also one of the few White Sox fans out there and thinks Michael Jordan is, hands down, the GOAT.