Getty Image / Mike Carlson / iStock / enscap67
For over a decade now, Jameis Winston has been the funniest man in football. It wasn’t always readily apparent to the outside world because Jameis’ antics were amplified by the mainstream news and his day-to-day hilarity never really got to shine through in his early days at FSU. But that changed in the NFL with a brighter spotlight and for those who might’ve forgotten how funny he is, this Jameis Winston fast food rankings is a reminder that he really is the funniest dude in the NFL.
Going by @Jaboowins on TikTok, Jameis Winston’s latest video has gone viral where he ranks items at random. It’s a super popular type of video on TikTok over the past, let’s call it 18 months or so, where the person in the video ranks things 1 through 10 but has to do so without knowing what comes next.
In this instance, Jameis Winston is ranking fast food chains and the first one to pop up is McDonald’s. That’s tricky because there’s no telling what the next 9 will be. You don’t want to rank McDonald’s too high or too low and get stuck placing a 5th tier chain (I’m looking at you, Blimpie) higher than the golden arches. Now that you know the premise, here is Jameis Winston ranking fast food chains and remind us all how hilarious he is:
@jaboowins Thats my list and I stand by it… #fastfood #foodtok #rankingfilter #bestfastfood
That same video also went viral on X (formerly Twitter) if anyone would prefer to watch it there over TikTok:
Jameis Winston ranking his favorite fast foods is straight comedy 😭 pic.twitter.com/n6FheKDPfs
— IcyVert (@IcyVert) September 20, 2024
First off, I love how this man mispronounces ‘Chipotle.’ It isn’t like how my late mother used to mispronounce it by adding the ‘L’ in front of the ‘T’ to say ‘chi-pull-tee.’ Jameis Winston makes this his own and omits the ‘L’ entirely calling it Chi-Poh-Tay. I believe they say ‘you can take the boy out of Bessemer, Alabama but you can’t take the Bessemer, Alabama out of the boy.’
My dude then called Chipotle “kind of like McDonald’s” and said they are “like the healthy McDonald’s” and now I 100% need to know what Jameis Winston, my fellow FSU alum, orders at McDonald’s and Chipotle that make them like one another.
Anyway, as far as rankings go this dude nailed it. Rarely do these blind rankings work out well but Jameis Winston’s fast food rankings came out pretty solid:
- Chick-fil-a
- McDonald’s
- Dunkin Donuts
- Chipotle
- Krispy Kreme
- Papa John’s
- Pizza Hut
- Subway
- Arby’s
- Panda Express
If we’re going to nitpick here… Krispy Kreme has fallen off hard over the years. America might run on Dunkin’ but their coffee is trash, their donuts are mid, and if you love it you’re from the Northeast and brainwashed into thinking coffee should taste like pure sure… No love for the garlic dipping sauce at Papa John’s?!… Subway should be 10th… Arby’s curly fries are great, to be sure, but Panda Express is better overall… That’s my take.
I’d also LOVE to know how or why Chipotle is just like McDonald’s. Everyone is wondering.