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I asked my colleagues this morning (on Slack) if anyone had watched even a second of ESPN in the past week outside of The Ocho and most of them just laughed. it off. The complete lack of sports has been wild.
Things have gotten so dire that I’ve been watching Marble Racing on YouTube (there’s a Joe Buck x Marble Racing clip below btw)! And I just suggested to my brother-in-law that we purchase some racing Hermit Crabs to pass the time.
Joe Buck gets it. He might be one of the top-3 most polarizing announcers in professional sports. I like the guy, a lot of people don’t. But even some of those dudes that hate Joe Buck are probably going to find these clips of him enjoyable where he’s announcing mundane life as if they were sporting events.
Allow yourself to relax for a minute and let Joe Buck take you to a place where sports exists even if it’s just in our minds. Here he’s narrating ESPN’s Mina Kimes’ dog playing fetch:
Here we go…first up is @minakimes and a half-eaten football. Please reply and tag with the charity that you are donating to!!! More to come! pic.twitter.com/q8BuYuutbr
— Joe Buck (@Buck) March 24, 2020
Joe Buck narrating dudes grilling wings is the EXACT type of content I need in my life right now.
We need to be friends. pic.twitter.com/zVtykOv6fK
— Joe Buck (@Buck) March 24, 2020
This clip of Joe taking on marble racing is my favorite so far.
This an an ancient one from like last week. @jellesmarbles blew up the internet with this gem and informs us the blue marble is named Comet and the yellow one is Pollo Loco. That said – I did my best. My smallish brain went from “marbles” to “balls” midway thru – old habits. pic.twitter.com/DsaGuHhli6
— Joe Buck (@Buck) March 24, 2020
This person is very clearly not struggling to stay busy at home right now. Good for them.
Ok Mardy. (I can only hear that in an Ozark twang). Here ya go! Now donate something!!!!!! pic.twitter.com/Pt4Q0bA0wA
— Joe Buck (@Buck) March 24, 2020
Joe Buck adds his voice to these bizarre darts throws that probably resulted in a shit ton of holes in the wall before we ever got this clip.
I have a feeling @letitflytom has won his fair share of drinks with skills like this. @PatrickMahomes would be proud. Let us know who you are donating to @letiflytom #bluesbrothers 🎯 pic.twitter.com/WyrkK0hPB6
— Joe Buck (@Buck) March 24, 2020
Sorry, Patriots fans. This one isn’t for you.
This one might make @patriots fans a bit sad…although Brady wishes he had these moves. @Brogan1197 tag your charity and take care of those boys, I might be seeing them on a Sunday one day! pic.twitter.com/bROi7PPwDE
— Joe Buck (@Buck) March 24, 2020
This one is excellent.
Watch out Breen…if @foxsports ever gets @NBA, I'm getting ready. @AdamHoge, tag a charity and then maybe order your kid a present to make him feel better after this one 🏀. pic.twitter.com/WJMGnrmBsa
— Joe Buck (@Buck) March 24, 2020
I don’t know if you guys have been experiencing this as well but the fact that Twitter keeps showing me ‘Live Game’ feeds at the top of their Trending section despite every single one of those games being postponed feels like salt in the wounds. Someone needs to hop on their scheduler and delete those trends because the games sure as shit aren’t happening.