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The Kansas City Chiefs moved to 11-1 on Friday with a 19-17 win over the Las Vegas Raiders and nobody is really sure how. The Chiefs played with their food for much of the game and nearly regretted when Las Vegas got the ball back with 1:56 remaining and marched right down into field goal range.
But rookie center Jackson Powers-Johnson snapped the ball to an unassuming Aidan O’Connell with 15 seconds remaining and Chiefs linebacker Nick Bolton recovered, hanging the Raiders a(nother) crushing defeat.
Las Vegas kicker Daniel Carlson, who entered the game 22-of-24 on the year, also missed three field goals against Kansas City, leaving NFL fans everywhere wondering “HOW DO THEY KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH THIS?”
Yes, the Chiefs are the defending Super Bowl champs. Yes, they have the best quarterback on the planet. But they have not played well for much of the year and yet they still boast the league’s best record.
How do they do it? Well, let me introduce you to Tayvoodoo.
Yes, Tayvoodoo is exactly what you likely think it is. It is a magical power wielded by Taylor Swift to curse anyone who should stand against her and aid anyone who sides with her. And if you think I’m full of s—, let me present to you the evidence!
Tayvoodoo helped the Seattle Seahawks, of all teams, beat the New York Giants last season after Giants fans booed Swift! It’s allegedly responsible for Kanye West’s downfall. It struck Pat McAfee and the Indianapolis Colts.
Look, I’m not one to believe in this sort of stuff. But at this point, the amount of evidence is seemingly undeniable. While I can’t positively confirm the existence of Tayvoodoo, I am also not going to sit here and deny it. That is a risk I am not comfortable taking. And all of you should probably follow suit.