The No Fun League Is Banning Tailgating Before This Year’s Super Bowl

One of the great aspects of a cold-weather game is the tailgating before. Sure, tailgating when it's nice out is great, but in the bitter, freezing cold, there is something extremely enjoyable about that. A sort of roughing-it-around-a-fire ethos. 

Now, the NFL has said you won't be able to do that (if you are one of the lucky 80,000 with Super Bowl tickets). That's right, they are banning tailgating at MetLife Stadium before the biggest game of the year. 

“You will be allowed to have food in your car and have drink in you car,” [Super Bowl CEO Al] Kelly said. “And provided you're in the boundaries of a single parking space, you'll be able to eat or drink right next to your car. However you're not going to be able to take out a lounge chair, you're not going to be able to take out a grill and you're not going to be able to take up more than one parking space. And it'll all be watched very carefully.”

Talk about the biggest buzzkill quote in the history of the world. You can eat your hot dog in your car. If my team (the Redskins) makes it this year, I'll break out a grill and get arrested. Think of the publicity. You could be the Rosa Parks of football. However, Kelly is not just shitting on the common man. He's shitting on rich people, too. 

And hiring a black car, taxi or limo won't be an option for VIPs who will spend several thousand dollars per ticket. No car will be allowed near the stadium on Feb. 2 without a parking pass, and any car that drops off a passenger will have to wait at the stadium. “Nobody's going to be dropped off by black car,” Kelly said. “You can have a black car a green car a white car a red car as long as you have parking, and the car needs to stay on premises the entire time.”

Yea, screw you, elite football fans (this I am in support of). 

[Via ESPN]