Meet Taishan Dong, A 7-Foot Tall, Ivan Drago-Like Chinese Boxer Who You Will Call ‘The Seven-Foot Dong’

Meet Taishan Dong, 7’0″ Chinese boxer who some people call “The Great Wall” and other, more awesome, people call “The Seven-Foot Dong.” Feel free to choose whatever name bucket you want to be in because Dong is here to stay. So call him “The Seven-Foot Dong” like a normal person, or be a complete fucking terrorist about it. The choice is yours.

According to Bleacher Report, Dong is a former kickboxer who has had two KO victories in his two fights since becoming a boxer. Dong’s currently been preparing for his third match, which is tonight, Feb. 27, against Roy McCrary.

Roy McCrary must be a tune up match, a warm body to kick the ever-living shit out of before Dong steps in the ring with Rocky Balboa. He better enjoy it, too, because to beat Balboa he’s going to have to kill him. And to kill him, he’s gonna have to have the heart to stand in front of him. And to do that, he’s got to be willing to die himself. I don’t know if he’s ready to do that. I don’t know.