‘Twilight’ actor Bronson Pelletier pisses all over LAX

Summit Entertainment

“I’m a werewolf! I piss wherever the hell I want!” When I watched the last Twilight movie, I was kind of flabbergasted by how huge the cast was. Sure, all of the attention goes to the big three stars, but there’s a literal army of background players who must have made fat cash in that flick. It seems like if you had any Native American ancestry and were willing to take your shirt off they’d cast you as a werewolf. And what do young stars do when they get that first big hit of money and fame? Why, they get wasted and make idiotic decisions like whipping their dick out and hosing down Los Angeles International Airport.

Bronson Pelletier, who played Jared in New Moon and Eclipse, just got busted by the cops for being falling-down drunk in LAX. Courtesy of TMZ, here’s video of the actor staggering around the terminal while a security guard tries to get him to sit down. Bronson then unzips his fly, whips out his dink and starts watering the carpet.

One of the most shocking things about this video is just how long the dude pees for. I can only imagine how much he must have been drinking to fill his bladder up to that level. The security guard is just forced to stand there and bask in the smell of releasing urine until Pelletier slows to a trickle, at which point some airport cops come in and hogtie him on the ground in a puddle of his own urine.

Celebrities pissing in public is nothing new – who can forget Marie Osmond whizzing all over herself on stage while performing on a cruise ship, or Prince William draining the Royal hog during a polo match? But this, to my knowledge, is the first famous whiz caught on video from beginning to end. What a great way to start 2013. Pelletier was busted on one count of public intoxication.