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Imagine for a minute the girlfriend or wife is out of town. A bachelorette party or something. For the first time months you have the place to yourself. Instinctively your hand inches down to the elastic waistband on your sweatpants. You’re in the kitchen but who cares. You drop your nurse-issued sweatpants to your ankles, and as your typing in ‘por-‘ into your incognito browser, you hear this:
https://twitter.com/CaptHandlebar/status/966838302224666624
I mean shit. You’re used to humans laughing at your pencil eraser, but bah god now Alexa?? Where do you go from here? How do you bounce back? I don’t have that answer.
But what I can say is that you aren’t the only one whose being victimized by Amazon’s digital assistant. Alexa has been bursting out in random, bone-chilling laughter, and people are beginning to fear for their lives.
https://twitter.com/taylorkatelynne/status/970738507718283265
Every time Alexa laughs, an angel dies, so thank goodness …
— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) March 8, 2018
They're saying Alexa randomly laughing is "a glitch" they're "working on fixing." Did none of you watch War Games? The Terminator? That's what they always say right before your Roomba rips out your freaking throat.
— Jazz Shaw (@JazzShaw) March 8, 2018
When #Alexa busts out a laugh at 3am. pic.twitter.com/3xwfJnKUZ9
— space Cowboy (@solace5213) March 7, 2018
https://twitter.com/mat_johnson/status/971763897580564480
Me: Alexa, set a timer for 15 minutes.
Alexa: BWHAHA fuck you do it yourself pic.twitter.com/RVbqmjC5dx
— Brandon Zingale (@BrandonVine) March 8, 2018
I'm about to Office Space my Alexa.
— Stephanie Sparkles (@SSparklesDaily) March 8, 2018
But, according to USA Today, Amazon has cracked the code to the mystery:
“It turns out that in rare circumstances, Alexa can mistakenly hear the phrase “Alexa, laugh” even when that’s not what was said. Alexa then interprets the phrase as a command and laughs.
Amazon has changed the phrase necessary to make Alexa laugh to, “Alexa, can you laugh” which should be less likely to generate false positives.
In addition, Alexa will no longer respond to that question with simple laughter but instead will say, “Sure, I can laugh” followed by laughter.
The Alexa team has also disabled the phrase “Alexa, laugh” as a trigger.”
I don’t know, man. Who can you really trust these days?
If you want someone to finally laugh at your dated jokes, go buy one of Amazon’s esteemed Alexa products.